Alexandria Brio is a 16-year-old girl who knows pain like the back of her hand. After getting kidnapped at the young age of two she has known nothing but pain, abuse, torture, suffering, and immense trauma. She has spent her whole life protecting he...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Gasping for air, I shoot up and my hand instinctively flies to the spot where I was shot. I have been having that same nightmare for a month straight. I still can't believe I've been back 'home' for a little over a month now.
My sleeping pills didn't work. I don't think not taking my drugs anymore helps my situation. Today will be my first official day without any of my old drugs and I was dreading it. My emotions have been all over the place. They are getting harder to hide and it's exhausting.
I'll act like I'm fine because I don't want my family to worry but in reality, I'm struggling. I feel like I'm drowning with weights tied to my ankles... trust me I know what that feels like because that's happened to me before. Probably one of my top five scariest punishments.
I shake my head trying to focus on something good. On the bright side, the medication Theo has been giving me has helped with my eating disorder. I now eat almost two meals a day which is a big step. It's been working so well that most of the time with these nightmares I don't throw up which is amazing!
I don't know what's in those pills of his but he needs to share it with the world. I do have to put in a lot of willpower to eat and I just can't think about what I'm eating. My eating disorder isn't completely gone but it's significantly better.
'With time Lex' I hear Theo's encouraging voice in my head.
I plop back down on my bed looking up at the ceiling. I let out a shaky breath making sure to be as quiet as possible. I didn't want to wake my brothers up.
"Nightmare?" Nino quietly asks from the other side of the bed.
Damn it, I woke him up. I close my eyes for a second and let a small breath out to calm myself down.
"Yeah." I softly say keeping my voice still. He can't know it's bad.
"Are you taking your sleeping pills?" Nino whispers concerned. I don't want to worry him.
"I forgot. That's the only reason I woke up." I convincingly lie straight through my teeth.
I hated that the lie slipped off my tongue so effortlessly. I don't want him to worry. I don't want my family to worry. They have enough to deal with. And I shouldn't be showing this much emotion anyway.
"You good?" He asks, I turn my head to him and he is already looking at me.
"Yeah. Goodnight." I whisper before looking back at the ceiling.
I didn't want to talk or keep him up any longer than I already had. He deserves to rest.
"Night." He whispers giving up on asking me questions.
The time that I have been here I have felt so weird. I've felt feelings that I didn't know I could and it confused the hell out of me. I didn't know how to react to certain things or how to reply. It was easy to pretend the first week I was here but as I continued to stop my drugs it became harder to hide my emotions.
