Loving HIM Unconditionally

I Want You Dead

Word count: 2,700

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Devendra's pov -

"No matter what I do for you, you'll always take Diya's side, won't you, Jay?" I said, my patience reaching to its limit now. A bubble of frustration was boiling inside me and I was not able to control it anymore.

"In your eyes, I'll always be the wrong one, right?"

"Before, you blamed me for not being able to see you with Diya, for betraying my own brother when you saw our photos of kissing each other."

"But when I told you the truth about everything, that I wasn't involved in those things, it was all her plan, then you started blaming me for drugging her and tying her up in the car, and because of that, she died in the accident."

"And now you're saying that you could have made decisions about your life, and I had no right to make decisions for you."

"Let me ask you something, you see all these things, but you don't see why I did all this? Even though you know Diya was wrong, she still seems right to you."

"And me, who did all this to save my younger brother's life, you see me as wrong."

"Bravo, Jay, bravo!"

"No matter how hard I try, you'll always take her side, you'll always think she was right. You know, when she was alive, I told her that I wouldn't let her win in her purpose. But look today, she won. She won even after dying, and I lost even after staying alive."

"No matter how hard I try, you'll always blame me for everything, you know why?"

"Because tu Paagal ho gaya hai Jay, paagal."

"Uske pyaar ne teko itna andha bana diya hai, ki teko uske alawa kucch aur dikhai hi nahi de raha hai," I said, my voice filled with frustration.

(Because you've gone mad, Jay, mad! Your love has blinded you so much that you can't see anything beyond her)

As I said this, I heard a gasp from Devyani.

As Devyani gasped, I could see the shock and disbelief in her eyes. She had never heard me speak with such intensity and raw emotion before. Jay, on the other hand, remained silent, his expression unreadable.

"Paagal," he repeated my word.

"Paagal bola mujhe? Haan ho gaya hu mein paagal."

"Paagal hi to bana ke rakh diya hai sabne mujhe. Pehle vo paagal bana kar chali gayi, fir yaha is kamre me band kar ke rakha, jis chiz ne mujhe aur paagal bana diya hai," Jay replied, his voice laced with bitterness and frustration.

(You called me mad? Yes, I am mad. They've all made me mad. First, she made me mad and left, then they kept me locked up in this room and made me even crazier)

"Again, you're blaming me for this, huh? It's visible to you that I've been kept locked up in this room, but why isn't it visible why I kept you locked up here?"

"Vo kyo hi dikhega, kyonki har ek chiz jo bhi me karta hu, usme tujhe acchai nazar hi kaha aata hai," I replied.

(Because no matter what I do, everything I do seems wrong to you)

"Haan nahi nazar aata. Kyonki mein to paagal ho gya hoon, naa," he said as he began hitting his own head with his own hand.

(Exactly, it's not visible. Because I have become mad)