For Shits and Giggles [2024]

Chapter 03

Santiago hovered above Felix and surveyed the carnage of Fior's remains, unfazed by the gore and viscera. He was immune to it by now—the sight of blood, death, and destruction had all become much too common in Pleasantwood. Especially for Santiago, whose job was to seek out these exact moments; horrific scenes that would leave anyone else sick or traumatized were just another opportunity for Santiago to show the world what he was capable of. And he was capable of a lot. After all, he was a superhero.

Felix was a difficult one to subdue though. He had served his time in the military, and was the only one in his platoon to make it back home alive. He was hailed a miracle when his story spread throughout the battalion. He was proof of God's mercy (as he told everyone that prayer got him through), and for the non-religious, he was a testament to the advantage of being one "extremely lucky sonovabitch". However, to Santiago, it simply meant that Felix was quick, cunning, and exceptionally hard to capture. The last time he and Felix got into it, Baby Cub ended up without a head. The sight of Grandpa Cub sobbing over the decapitated body of his grandson was enough to leave the town rattled and buzzing for days, even after Baby Cub had come back to life.

As such, Santiago wanted to make this quick. He didn't want to peacock the way he usually did when swooping in to save someone. He didn't want to attract another crowd (that's how Baby Cub ended up dead) or drag it out until he was satisfied with the attention and praise. This one was personal; he wanted Felix gone as quickly as possible. Besides, he still had a burning building full of innocent people to save.

Santiago landed on the antique shop's roof and looked down on Felix. He shouted at him, called him weak, pathetic, and not a real hero. That was the quickest way to goad Felix into reacting, and Santiago knew it would rile him up even more than he already was. It worked. Felix looked up from Fior's corpse, his face and hands dripping blood. He didn't move.

"Oh c'mon," Santiago shouted again, "Don't tell me you're scared?"

"I knew that whole story was all bullshit," he continued.

Felix's jaw clenched tightly, and Santiago knew he was close.

"You," Santiago continued, "the only survivor? Of course you were! You hid away like a pussy while your teammates sacrificed their lives fighting. You're no soldier, you're just a scared. little. bitch." He made sure to enunciate the final three words for emphasis.

And that did it; Felix saw red. He gripped the glass between his teeth and sprinted at the storefront, jumping from the top of Fior's totaled car. Felix hung onto one of the shop's exposed ceiling supports and hung there for a second, easily supporting his own weight. He pulled himself up with barely a grunt; climbing from the beam to the half-ruined awning to finally the edge of the roof. By the time Felix stood up on the roof, jaw still clenching the shard of glass, Santiago was standing proudly at the opposite end of the building.

Felix was careful, calculating. He knew not to make the first move.

"C'mon," Santiago shouted, opening his arms wide and exposing his chest, "Let's settle this like men. No powers, no weapons, just you and me!"

Gracie gasped, still across the street, quietly rooting for Santiago. Without the Tree, Santiago was no match for Felix. It wasn't even a question. She knew this was a terrible idea. Could Santiago just turn off his powers on command? Was Felix angry enough to fall for it?

She saw that yes, Felix was. He spit the shard of glass off the side of the roof, leaving a long string of red saliva hanging from his lip.

"What are you doing?" Gracie finally screamed, not wanting Felix to further prove her right. She ran across the street and around the car, being extra careful not to disturb Fior's cadaver. She ran parallel to Felix—him across the roof, her on the sidewalk. Felix didn't stop, and Santiago didn't move. He stood in the exact same spot, perfectly still except for his hands balling into fists. She wanted to turn into the alley below Santiago, but there was a steel gate in her way. She gripped the bars and shook hard, trying to get his attention. The hinges shrieked and the bottom scraped the concrete loudly.