𝐂𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐈𝐭 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐖𝐚𝐧𝐭

Sunshine - 01

It was going to be a long day. I could sense it even before I open my eyes. Mama's voice echoes in the distant to wake me up. I peel my eyes open with great difficulty and stare at the ceiling.

Tumbled in the sheets I couldn't tell where my limbs & the bedsheet starts and ends. I want to sleep more but duty calls refrains me from going back to the deep slumber I wish lasted another hour longer.

Welcome to the reality it doesn't.

Today is my first day in Guardian Elites.
After my graduation in April I was on the job hunt. Even a graduate with a validate degree has hardships in finding job these days. After so many trials & interviews Guardian Elites, one of the biggest Security Company recruited me for their PR team.

It's just my first step to being independent. All this time I so badly wanted to live by myself without worrying my parents. I had to depend on them all my life. Now that my education is completed I intend to make my wishes come true.

"Shivanya!" Mama calls. "Are you awake yet?!"

"Haan Mama!" I call back. My voice tinged with sleep.

I take a deep breath and untangle myself from the sheets. My hair which was in a braid now a bird's nest reflected in the mirror opposite my bed. I go to the washroom and wait outside closing my eyes.

"Arya! Come outside! It's getting late. I have to go to work & it's my first day!" I shout at my brother who takes his precious time inside.

"You must have thought about it before getting your beauty sleep! You dumbo!" He calls back from the shower his voice muffled by the door.

"It must be a miracle that for once you have woken before me" I grumble.

The next moment he opens the door "I am a miracle myself. " he wiggles his eyebrows and ruffles my already tangled hair.

"Mama!" I shout annoyed.

"God! These children have grown into adults and I still have to break their fights." she says from the kitchen and "Shivanya! Arya! You kids get ready soon or else you both are going to miss the bus!" She shouts.

I finish getting ready with my pink kurta and mom jeans with the white dupatta pinned to my right shoulder.

I look at myself in the mirror. Like the rest of the people at my house I am not as beautiful as them. I am just a girl who is lean and tall with brown skin & pimples, which is normal I know but not the beauty standard according to society.

I don't mind until someone points out them during a function or an event infront of all the people. I hate it when someone comments about skin tone or their appearance. I always have insecurities which I don't share with anybody from the fear that they'll make fun of them so I keep them to myself.

Aside from my inferiority complex my other negative point is my people pleasing skills. I always want to come off as approachable. Even my bestfriend Nitya comments about how I help everyone and they use me. It is like my default setting I couldn't undo it.

I have a hard time saying no to people. I don't want to be rude that's what I tell her. But she being my bestfriend since forever takes the role of the mama bear and scares off the people who take advantage of me. I love her for that.

I go downstairs to the breakfast table. Papa sits at the table with Arya and Zara who is the baby of the family. Mama serves them.

"Good Morning Papa!" I say cheerfully.

"Morning Shivi." he greets me without looking up.

I sit in the chair and wait for my turn to take the parathas from Mama and start eating.

"So what is your role in this company Shivi?" Papa asks from his place finally glancing up at my profile.

"I have been appointed in the Public Relations team Papa. I will be working as the writing agent for advertisements and announcements. Only an intern for now but after 6 months they'll validate my job permanently if I am good at what I am doing." I say optimism brimming in my voice.

"If?" Zara taunts. As usual her teenage hormones makes an appearance early in the morning.

I answer carefully, "Yes Zaru. 'If'. If I work hard and prove them I am capable they'll appoint me, If I am not I am out" I say, my exuberance deflating.

"Then let's say goodbye to this job." she laughs like she said something funny. Mom shakes her head without saying anything and Arya swats her arm.

I just give them a tight smile, like it didn't hurt and finish my breakfast.

Mama kisses Zara on the head and sends her school with Papa as I notice it in my peripheral vision without making it obvious.

I always used to envy their bond and affection towards each other.
It's not that Mama doesn't love me. She loves Zara more and always takes her side.

I love my sister. She's one of the most lovable person when she wants to be. But I feel like if I hugged my Mama it'll make us feel weird or awkward. Like I am trying to come between them.

Sometimes when I feel down I want to hug her so badly but I keep it to myself. Some things are not meant for me.

My middle child syndrome always makes me resent their relationship. Like they share some secrets without me which always makes me feel guilty because they are my family. But I love them with everything I have so that makes me feel a little human.

I wait in the bus stand tapping my foot. There's 30 minutes more so I hope that I won't be late on my first day.

The morning crowd consists of various school going teenagers and working people.

One day I am going to achieve my dream and fly high making my parents proud. That's my dream since I started school.

I know it's every average student's dream. But that doesn't make my aspirations any less worthy. Huh.

As I start dreaming about what the future might entail a white car parks infront of me. I already know who that car belongs to.

I take deep breaths to calm my nerves and watch as the passenger door opens and comes the voice of the person I dread hearing since highschool.

"Get inside Shiv."

Shariq Raichand.

To be continued...
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