Codependency

Part 8 // I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

Catra had decided to take a few days away from the front lines to look after Adora, for which she was very grateful to the cat. If Catra didn't still care, she would just leave Adora's wounds to fester while she rotted alone in a holding cell. Now, Adora was watching Catra sleep. They shared the large cot easily, but Catra was still a fan of stretching out across Adora's torso while they slept, which both amused Adora and crushed her lungs. She didn't stop her though. How couldn't she reward these tiny glimpses of mercy?

Adora wasn't really looking at Catra per say, so much as covered by a layer of her long hair. It draped across Adora's face and it smelled like home. She wanted to touch it.
"No." Catra's grunt made Adora pull back the hand she'd been hovering over the sleeping girl.
Confusion lit Adora's mind.
"Catra?"
"No!" Catra dug her claws into Adora's uninjured arm and pulled it close to her.
"Catra, claws!" Adora yelped, but she didn't pull away. That would just make more wounds.
Catra shuffled into a position that moved her hair away from Adora's face, and pressed her head into Adora's collar.
"Stop it..." Catra murmured worriedly as she clung to Adora's arm.
Adora heard her take a long inhale, sigh, and sheathe her claws again.
"I'm literally right here. Im not doing anything." Adora put a tentative hand on Catra's shoulder. "Wake up."

"Mrrrah!"
Catra's trill of alarm pierced Adora's ears. She sat bolt upright and stared down at Adora for a long moment before dropping her arm.
"You're in the Frightzone, you're in your room." Adora said calmly. "Did you have a nightmare?"
Catra squinted crossly at her.
"I don't need you coddling me! Nightmares are for kids."
Catra's tail found Adora's injured arm and rested on it lightly.
"I didn't say anything, did I?"
Adora blinked at her. Maybe she shouldn't say anything that would potentially embarrass Catra.
"You mostly just seemed angry."
Catra looked at Adora's injured arm and her tail slithered away as she peered closely at it under the bandage.
"This is looking better." Catra muttered. She noticed the red spots on Adora's other arm where her claws had obviously been. "Oh..."
Adora looked at her new scratches, then looked at Catra nonchalantly.
"What, these? You've cut me worse in training!" She laughed. "If anything, I deserve it."
Catra's brows furrowed at the comment.
"Pardon? You what?"
Adora raised her eyebrows to look earnest.
"Well, yeah, you're just being a good Force Captain by not condoning betrayal." It was like she was explaining Catra's own plan back to her, and it made perfect sense.
Catra leaned back onto her hands.
"You think you deserve to get clawed." She clarified.
"I think Horde traitors deserve worse." Adora didn't move her eyes from Catra's. "Don't you?"
Catra twitched an ear at her.
"Yeah. I do."
"So maybe..." Adora reached out and placed a hand on Catra's tail. "You can do it again..." Catra's eyes widened in alarm as Adora stroked her tail. "-and then I can prove how dedicated I am to... the Horde."
Catra lashed her tail away and climbed out of the cot.
"You're not supposed to want this." She growled. "You're supposed to be..." she trailed off, looking rather frustrated.
"Suffering?" Adora nodded. "I can suffer. I'll cry if you want."
Catra took an uneasy pace back.
"What?"
"I deserve it. Just lash out at me again, I can take it. I'm sure Hordak would do much worse, but it should be you." Adora let the unfiltered thoughts tumble out of her.

"Stop it." Catra's voice cracked. "I should have never taken your memories. This isn't what I wanted."
"Didn't you want me back?" Adora pleaded. "Didn't you think I might be as trapped there as you want me to be here?"
Catra shook her head.
"No! I mean, yes, but no- you left me! You left on purpose..."
"So make me pay for it already. I have to redeem myself for you." Adora begged, sitting up and leaning over the bed towards Catra.
Catra pulled her hands close to her own body.
"Shut up, Adora!"
"I can never earn your forgiveness. I know. But I was wrong. I'm sorry." Adora kept talking, despite the horrified look on Catra's face. "Just hit me or something. Just-"
Catra put her hands in her hair and stumbled back another foot.
"Shut up! Stop talking!"
"I was wrong to leave. I would have never left you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Catra."
Catra stared in shocked silence at Adora.
Adora leaned closer, starting to get out of the cot. Catra snapped out of her shock and bent forward to grab Adora as she fell. Adora grabbed hold of Catra's uniform and pulled herself up to face her.
"Can't we go back, one day? Maybe when I'm done paying for-"
Catra yanked Adora by the arm roughly and stormed out of her room. She looked uncomfortable and angry.