Super Emotions

Still Heart Broken

Crying.

I'm still crying.

It's been a week and I'm still crying.

My skin isn't blue. This is a different kind of sad.

It's not like your relative or best friend youve known forever died. No. This, this is heart break. And it hasn't gone away. It's been a week. A darn chainsaw that is about as sharp as knives is piercing my heart, and it's ten times longer than a regular chainsaw so it takes twice as long for it to come in, then to come out.

It hurts. Bad. And I hate the feeling. A lot. I wish it would go away. I really do. I don't know how one British boy, with perfect white teeth and auburn hair, and a smile that lights up my entire world, could hurt me so badly. But he did. And the pain hasn't gone away. No matter how many times I cry, how many times I scream, how many times I sob, or how many times I bawl, the pain won't leave. Even though I really wish it would.

I guess it gets easier, how many times you break your heart. It probably hurts less each time. I wouldn't know though. It's my first time having my heart broken, and with super emotions, the pain might take even LONGER to go away. That's what Marcus tells me anyways. I really wish he wasn't so smart, and that his theories never came true. But he's probably right.

None of my friends seem to be of much help. Tesha is in a long distance relationship, so her heart break won't last long. If they even break up.

Naomi hasn't been in a single relationship in her entire life. How would she know?

Justice never really dates. She flirts, but doesn't settle down and falls in love. She wouldn't know either.

The lads Thomas, Kevin, and Eric wouldn't know either. Theyre boys. I'm not even going to ask them. I haven't asked Ky yet though.

And Grace. She's Grace. She leads guys in so they fall deeply and madly in love with her, then she breaks their heart. Smashes it. Sometimes I feel bad for them.

Can't forget Rachel. She.... Doesn't date either. I'm not so sure. Grace and I are trying to see about her and boys though.

I've eaten about 10 gallons of ice cream. Ive had at least 20 milkshakes. And at the least, 40 candy bars. Nothing helps. I thought desserts WOULD help. Desserts= Stressed spelled backwards. Did you know that? I did. But it hasn't helped.

So here I am.

Sitting in a bathtub.

Trying to stop crying.

My mom had suggested a nice relaxing bath to help center my "Chi". Well, my Chi ain't centered Ma!

She had brewed a boiling hot bathtub, lit lavender scented candles, dimmed the lights, put scented flowers in the bathtub, and played soft music. I was crying though. I'm pretty sure half of the bath water was my tears. No joke.

I needed to get out of here. It wasn't helping.

I climbed out of the bathtub, and I was engulfed in the cold air. I shivered and grabbed a soft pale yellow towel my mom had set on the heating rack. Feeling a little warmer, I drained the bath water and walked over to my closet. After drying my wet skin, which was bright red from the hot water, I grabbed a pair of baggy teal sweatpants. I also pulled on a huge black T shirt with a recycling sign on the back(I also of coarse put on lingerie!). I pulled my hair into a bun on top of my head and slipped on some bright blue fuzzy slippers. I also put on a polka-dotted robe. I exited my room and trudged downstairs.

No one was home. It was afternoon, but Blake was at some after school club and Mom was at work. Yeah. I stayed home from school. Marcus commanded me to stay home to prevent any "incidents" to occur since I'm emotionally unstable. I'm cool with that though. I'm a mess.

I walked towards the coach and lazily fell down. I didn't turn on the TV though. I just sort of laid there. I sniffled and quickly grabbed a tissue off the coffee table.

After five minutes of staring at the black TV screen, my cell phone went off. I lazily picked it up as Rachel's name flashed on the screen, and a funny picture of us drinking some sort of green smoothie.

"Hey Emma. How are you feeling?" she asked.

"No better than when you called yesterday." I replied dryly.

"Listen. Emma, Marcus can't keep you out of school. You need to move on. Locking yourself in your house and eating all the grocery store's ice cream won't solve your problems. You need to come to school and try to get over him." she stated.

I thought about it for a while. I guess she was right. I can't move on if I don't try, right?

"Alright. I'll be at school on Monday." I said to her.

"No no no no no. You will be at school tomorrow. And all of your friends will be there to help and support you lovingly." she told me sympathetically.

"Fine."

"Okay good! See you tomorrow!" she said happily as she hung up.

I groaned and lay back down.

School.

Tomorrow.

Oh joy.

Thank Rachel.