LOSING IT ALL //HAYLEY PARKER

32

~LOSING IT ALL~

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32 | CAMILLE
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Jayden has been cheating on you for a very long time, Hayley.

DALE'S WORDS KEEPS going on a repeat in my head. A cold knot forms in my stomach as I reel off from the confession. Jayden has been cheating on you for a very long time, Hayley.

A dry rasping cackle that bubbles out of my throat belies the conflicting emotions that whirls in me at the realization of the truth. Dale watches me a tad bit warily, confused by the way I'm responding to the news.

"Hayley—,"

The raising of my finger brings him to a stop at whatever he is going to say. Untangling my hand from his, I lean back and observe him through tipped eyebrows.

"He's been cheating on me for a very long time. So, you knew about it then, didn't you?" I ask in a surprisingly calm voice. Dale's expression suddenly grows thoughtful at the question. He understands where I'm going to and ruefully buries his head into his large hands.

"Jayden has been my friend for years, Hayley." He starts solemnly, pleadingly looking at me. "I found out myself at the Whitley's party and I talked to him about it. Back then, I saw that he genuinely loved you, but then I started doubting him when his actions didn't match his words anymore."

I nod incredulously, running my hand through my hair. "So, it took you so long to figure out that your friend was actually an arsehole, right?"

Dale catches my hand, his warm fingers sliding over the top of mine, and in as much as I would have unwittingly lean into his touch, I recoil from it instead. Anger blazes brighter within me. I'm not upset at Jayden for cheating, I'm upset that Dale knew about it all along and yet he stringed me on.

"Hayley."

My world goes water blurred and hazy as I try to comprehend the fact I so unflaggingly see. "I'm certain you also knew about our fallout, right?" Dale runs his hand over his face, deflated and I know I am not very far from the truth. "Why then did you call me here, huh? You knew about everything and you kept it to yourself thinking you were probably protecting me from the truth, and then, when it has finally convenience you, you come telling me all about it."

"I honestly didn't want to hurt you, Hayley." Dale's voice is laced with despair, "Jayden kept saying you were the real deal, how could I possibly try to break you both up then. I thought you both were really in love, okay. Please believe me."

"Wow, my knight." I scoff derisively.

"Hayley." Dale calls out desperately, leaning over the table to search for my touch. I lean further away from him.

"I bet you finally thought you can have me now, right? Kissing me and all, being so sweet and caring, just making sure that if I break I'd fall on you, right?"

"Hayley!" Dale barks in a coarse, hurt tone. I slip off the wooden chair and grab my tote bag from on top the granite island. Before I can sprint for the door, Dale is already on me, pinning me down against himself. I wrestle futilely in his iron grip, trashing and screaming at him, calling him names and cussing at him. He holds it all together, begging for forgiveness.

"LET GO OF ME, YOU ARSEHOLE! YOU'RE NO BETTER THAN HIM! SON-OF-A-BITCH!"

Dale knees are against the small of my back, hot, as his strong, square hand's unwaveringly tugs me into his hard chest. Salty droplets spills down my cheeks, my heart squeezes and tears into multiple pieces. Dale doesn't let go until I've finally calmed down and sag into his embrace.

"Tell me one thing, Dale Randall." I say in a groggy and tired voice. "With who? Who has my dear loving boyfriend been cheating on me with?"

Dale is quiet for a while, his breath shallow and rapid against my back. When I struggle to break free from his tight grip, he spills out in misery. "Camille! His been with Camille!" And that's when my world completely shatters before my eyes. I wrestle with how to breath for a minute, and then with a strength I didn't know I can muster, I fling Dale from off my body and tumble out of his apartment.

Camille! His been with Camille!

I fumble with the elevator's button and when it finally slides open, I'm stagger in, barely gaining my balance and then fall in an heavy thud to the floor.

Camille! His been with Camille!

How is this even possible! Camille is gay and she's my best friend! How can I possibly believe Dale? How can I possibly believe that my gay girlfriend has been shagging my boyfriend! Ugh!

Hash, cold wind slaps against my cheeks when I self unconsciously drag myself out of the apartment building. The piercing weather sipping into my sides and freezing my at fingers does not mirror the emotional agony settling into my soul.

Camille! His been with Camille!

Isn't this just so hilarious? Everyone that I have so much cared about and respected is finally stabbing me in the back. I've been living with them for so long, thinking I know my friends, thinking I know my company, but the harsh reality is that, I don't know them at all. I would never have thought that my best, sanctimonious friend is the reason my relationship is crashed, and also the reason why I'm losing everything and everyone I care about. Is this how it feels to lose it all? Is this how it feels to be betrayed?

Tears keeps rolling fervently down my face and slicing down at my cheeks as I trudge slowly down the narrow sidewalk under the yellow streetlights. All I can do is to put one foot in front of another, leading me to the inevitable.

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