A Ghoul in the Making by Ryder Frost

Chapter 29: You Left Me, Why?

Notes: Aether wonders if coming back was the right thing to do. Ok folks, this is Aether's POV and an emotional interaction between him and Papa, Papa is very upset with Aether for leaving and is saying so. Aether does repeat himself a bit in a few sentences but when I'm emotional I tend to do that too so bear with me, I'm not terribly good at this kind of thing.

After lunch I went back to my own room, I looked around and nothing had been moved or changed. I had been gone for months now and a tear rolled down my cheek that they'd all left my room alone, as if they knew someday, I'd be back. The day Storm did that Summoning spell seemed like it had been preplanned or something. I shrugged the thought away, at least they didn't hear my thoughts anymore, thankfully. I chuckled and blushed at how they all reacted when I'd come into the Dining Hall with Copia earlier. I sighed as I sat on my bed, smelling him on me and went to take a shower. As I showered my mind wandered to earlier that week. 'How had Storm been able to Summon me like that, I mean I know he's Quintessence like I am but even I couldn't do something like that without proper training.' The shower pelted my skin, and I sighed enjoying the hot stream of water flowing down my back and legs. Still deep in thought. I finished moments later and dressed in a simple band tee and pajama pants, it had gotten a bit chilly since I'd left the Ministry and I stoked the fire in my hearth, willing the flame to life, as the heat caressed my face and the crackling of the flames on the logs distracted me, another thought occurred to me. 'Is my return really a good idea, would they want me to rejoin the band? I didn't want to put Storm out, he had been doing a fantastic job from what Papa had told me and frankly, I didn't want to travel anymore. What if I ended up causing more harm than good being back, but the others had said Copia wasn't well when I left, and I really didn't want to leave him again. I was glad to be home even if all I was to Copia now was someone to share his bed with and confide in, however, he still seemed angry and sad before lunch today and I hoped to speak to him later.' I sighed again and rummaged through my fridge for a beer to dull the ache between my eyes. I found one, popped the tab, then sipped at it, I walked towards my couch and turned the tv on to find some nonsense show to occupy my thoughts but it was short lived and I grew annoyed quickly, I swished my tail in agitation, baring my fangs, huffing like a petulant child, I looked for a book to read and sat down the TV in the background as I lost myself in the pages. I was about a quarter of the way through when a knock sounded on my door, and I growled. The beer hadn't done much to dull my headache. If that was Dew playing a prank, I'd tan his hide. The knocking continued and I shouted, "JUST A DAMN MINUTE!" I stalked to the door and threw it open. "WHAT?!" I shouted and my face turned beet red as I realized who was at the door.

"Dear Satan, Aether, what's with the attitude?" I swiped my hand across my face.

"Sorry Papa." I mumbled as I stepped aside to let him in. He looked at me as he walked towards my couch, I grabbed the remote and turned off the TV and for a few moments, the silence was almost deafening. All I heard was the beating of my heart in my ears as I wondered why he'd come. "Uh, what's up Papa?" I said, my voice quivered slightly, and I inhaled to steady myself. He had that look about him, that scent about him, a mixture of anger, hurt, and wanting to cry. I sat down next to him and waited, a beat later he inhaled and put his arms across his chest. "Why did you leave?" He asked me with a tone of vehemence. His bottom lip trembled a bit and I chugged the last of my beer and waited for the tears to come, Copia didn't hide when he was hurt very well and this is one of those times, I could read him like a book. The dam was going to break and then mine would too. It always happened, if he was upset then I was too.

"You know why I left Copia." I said softly. He glared at me, and my heart panged a bit under his hardened gaze.

"YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO LEAVE, YOU COULD'VE STAYED ON AS A NORMAL GHOUL BUT YOU LEFT US, LEFT ME!" He screamed at me, his voice shaking at the last two words, the emotion made his white eye stand out in the firelight of my room. I didn't answer, I didn't know how to, so I just listened. "I TEXTED YOU; I CALLED YOU FOR MONTHS! NOT ONCE DID YOU CALL ME OR TEXT ME BACK, YOU LEFT ME ALONE WHEN I NEEDED YOU THE MOST!" He hollered, his voice cracking as he lowered his face into his hands. His shoulders shook as he began to sob. I felt tears prick in my eyes, but I held them back.

"Cope..uh Papa, I I'm s sorry. So very sorry." My lips trembled and I cracked out the last syllable. I began to use his name but decided, that given the circumstance, using his title might be a bit more appropriate. I touched his shoulders, hoping my apology would assuage some of the anger and anguish that coiled off him like a river of lava, but he beat my hand away.

"No, save it!" He hissed at me, and I found myself slightly hurt by the bite in his tone.

The urge to comfort him gnawed at me, I reached over and embraced him, this time he didn't do anything, he just turned his head and sobbed into my chest, smearing my shirt with his greasepaints. I awkwardly pat his back. I was not so good at these types of things. I held him tightly. He pulled away after a moment and I found myself wanting him back in my arms. His eyes were dark. "YOU LEFT ME! WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME? IT WASN'T JUST THE TOURING I KNOW IT WASN'T SO TELL ME THE REAL REASON AETHER! YOU OWE ME THAT!" He screamed at me, and I snarled back at him, gesturing wildly as I waved my arms trying to get the message across, "BECAUSE I LOVED YOU COPIA, THAT'S WHY!" My lips shook and my voice cracked as I tried unsuccessfully to stop the tears from spilling over, they flowed over my cheeks and down my chin. "I FUCKING LOVED YOU!" I shouted as my own choking sobs, made my shoulders shake. I clenched my fists to my sides and my tail lashed the air and I took a shuddering breath, "I loved you Copia, but you had just become Papa and I'd only be a distraction to your message and you, we both know what Imperator would do if you failed in your mission, and I couldn't bear that thought, I couldn't stand it if she had you killed because a Ghoul loved you, you know she sees us as nothing but property to serve the Ministry and it's Clergy, what if the fate that befell your brothers, befell you!" I choked out, my tears streaming freely down my cheeks, as I stood ramrod straight. "If you failed because of me, I I I c couldn't live with myself knowing I was the cause." I whispered, gulping in air as my sobs shook my body. 'There I'd admitted it, the real reason I made myself scarce and I hoped he'd understand. Copia was silent and stared at me as if he were studying my face for any signs that my answer was a lie.

"Y you loved me?" He whispered almost as if he'd imagined it. I turned my purple eyes towards him and nodded, meeting his mismatched gaze.

"Yes, Papa, I loved you and I still do." I said barely above a whisper. He didn't say anything else but picked at his lip absentmindedly, a cute habit he'd developed over the years that still made me smile. "Quit biting your lip, Papa." I said half-heartedly. He glared and then burst into laughter. "Oh, fuck you, Aether." He said and I burst into a fit of giggles rolling onto the couch and tackling him playfully.

"Well, I mean..." I snorted at the look of surprise on his face.

"Un-fucking-believable." He huffed at me, pushing me off him. I burst into a fit of uncontrollable laughter. Moments later, he laughed as well, his rich baritone laugh. Hearing it made my heart swell with love again. He gathered himself and I looked at him with a smirk, taking in his disheveled appearance, his face paint was a mix of blacks and greys, his salt and pepper hair was tussled from his angry outburst and my heart clenched that I'd been the cause of such anguish. 'I'll never leave him again' I thought, as I pointed towards my bathroom.

"Go and clean up Papa." He nodded and went to wash his face and fix his hair. Moments later, he was freshened up and I helped him adjust his tie, I began to wonder if things would ever be alright between us. True, we'd goofed off and laughed a bit, but I could still smell the hurt upon him and as I patted his red jacket, smoothing any wrinkles, I smiled but then frowned. 'Just ask him' I chastised myself. "Uh Papa before you go, I uh w will we uh will we be alright?" He turned to face me again and shrugged.

"I don't know Aether; I just don't know." He said softly before turning the knob and exiting my room, I watched him leave and fought the urge to chase after him. I sighed and fell onto my bed and began to sob again. I sobbed until the veil of sleep claimed me and I surrendered to it and slept.