Help Me Heal

Chapter 41

Sunday had arrived - the day of the shopping trip that Hank had managed to commit himself to. He was looking forward to spending time with Kalinda and Erin as a group, but he wished the circumstances were different. The moment he had suggested doing something together and Kalinda had opted for a shopping trip had been the first time in their relationship where their thinking had been totally disconnected. Still, he had agreed to the idea and he was going to make the best of it.

Erin was definitely looking forward to it. He could tell that as they ate breakfast together at the dining table.

"You know... dad... I'm doing my best to make saying that feel natural," she said, faltering.

He gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "It'll come with time. I hope. What were you going to say?"

"I hope it will. And I was going to say I'm proud of you for being in a committed interracial relationship. Shoot, the came out sounding super patronising. Not how I meant it at all."

Hank downed some of his coffee. It had sounded patronising, but he ignored that aspect of it. "Thanks, but I don't even think of it as an interracial relationship. It's just a relationship to me. Kalinda is the woman I love, and I don't care what race she is." He reflected on that for a second. "That's not how I meant that to sound either. Her race or mine just haven't been a factor. We talked about it and she said she doesn't follow many Hindu beliefs, although she does make time to pray every day."

Erin had been listening with interest while eating her bacon and eggs. "Have you prayed with her?"

That question gave Hank a jolt – the kind of feeling his mind associated with screwing something up on a case. "I haven't. Truthfully? It never occurred to me to suggest it. And Kalinda hasn't suggested it."

"Guess maybe she thinks you wouldn't be interested. Would you be interested?"

Hank nodded. "I'd pray with her. It might mean a lot to her if I told her I'd like to do that, huh?"

"I think it would," Erin said confidently.

Greatly appreciating the advise, Hank reached out and touched her hand. He wished showing affection to her didn't feel so out of place. "Thanks for helping my old ass with things I ought to think of for myself."

Erin looked at his hand on hers for a moment, then moved it, instead taking his hand and giving it a squeeze. "Will this ever feel right?" Her tone told him that she badly wanted the reassurance that it would.

"I think it will," he said with confidence. The words were chosen carefully so that he didn't outright promise something when there was a hopefully only slight chance of it not happening.

"I hope so. I do want calling you dad to feel right to me."

"Whether you call me it or not, I'm going to be the best dad I can."

He could see that meant a lot to Erin. Not knowing what to say, after a few moments she changed the subject and conversation turned to the impending shopping trip.

-----

Less than an hour later, Hank parked his car outside of Kalinda's apartment and sent her a text to say that he and Erin had arrived. He didn't blame her for not waiting outside as a light rain shower was falling, and as always it was cold.

A few minutes went by, then Kalinda emerged from the building. As ever, Hank found both her appearance and her outfit extremely appealing. He didn't look forward to summer arriving, when the leather would have to go away for a few months.

"I really love Kalinda's style," Erin said from the passenger seat. "She's got a look that suits her so perfectly. What I'd give to have that."

"Don't talk yourself down," he said. It was obvious to both of them that he wasn't the person to try giving fashion advice.