Bleach truth or dare! [Discontinued]

Chapter EIIGGHHHTTT WHY AM I SCREAMING AAAHHHH

Me: Yaaayyy new chapter! More fresh dares from Lunar-San!

Grimmjow: NOOOOO

Rukia: it's not that bad..

Ichigo: says the one who hasn't hardly gotten any dares yet!

Me: Ok, let's get started! First, Aizen, why did you want to date Momo?

Aizen: I just would rather date her than you. I don't like her in that way.

Me: *heart shatters again*

Me: ;^;

Me: o-ok...next truth...Ulquiorra do you like Lunar?

Ulquiorra: Not really

Orihime: That's kinda mean...

Ulquiorra: I don't care

Me: And...for the next truth...Rangiku when are you and Toshiro going to date?

Toshiro: Never!! I have no interest in-

Rangiku: *glomps him* CAPTAIN!!!

Toshiro: *can't talk because Rangiku's boobs are in his face*

Shunsui: *laughing really hard*

Me: Next! Everyone, do you think Lunar is going too far with-

Grimmjow: YES

Me: You don't even know what I was going to say! Do you think she's going to far with the Grimmjow x Ulquiorra thing?

Grimmjow: Still yes.

Me: Ulquiorra? Everyone?

Everyone: Yeah kinda

Me: Oohh...I don't think you're going to far Lunar so keep doing it if you want

Grimmjow: GRAAAAHHH!!! *jumps me*

Me: *ducks*

Grimmjow: *faceplants*

Me: This next dare requires Uryuu, so... *poofs in Uryuu*

Ishida: *looks around* WHAT IN A QUINCY'S BUTTHOLE IS THIS?!?!

Me: wat

Me: Uryuu you have to kiss Ichigo and get married

Both: WHAAAATT?!?! OH HELL NO!!

Me: Welp you won't do it on your own so *pushes them together*

Ichigo: *INTERNAL SCREAMING FOR ETERNITY*

Uryuu: aAAAHHHHH I KISSED MY RIVAL GEGLDSNOWMLLSAPGSBOWKODJH

Me: *gets in preachers outfit* Do you, Kurosaki, take Ishida as your husband for all eternity?

Kurosaki: No.

Me: I'm taking that as a yes. Do you, Ishida, take Kurosaki as your *whispers* hootttt *normal voice* husband?

Uryuu: Hell no.

Me: No cussing while getting married!

Uryuu: We aren't in a church. And I don't think two men would get married in a church anyway.

Me: SHUT UP THIS IS MY BOOK

Me: I pronounce you husband and husband! *puts rings on their finger*

Rukia: *heartbroken on the inside* *emotionless face*

Orihime: *crying in corner* Kurosaki will never be mine now!!

Me: For the next one, it's with Nel and Ichigo!

Nel: Yay! *still in adult form*

Ichigo: Oh god

Me: Nel, do you want Ichigo to be yours?

Nel: YES!!

Me: he's yours

Nel: OML REALLY *glomps him*

Uryuu: Take him. I don't want him.

Ichigo: AM I A DOG OR SOMETHING?!?! BECAUSE IM GETTING PASSED AROUND LIKE ONE

Me: No you're a strawberry.

Me: Last one!

Ichigo: Thank god

Me: Rukia, do you hate or love Ichigo?

Rukia: well...I don't HATE him, that's for sure...so...I guess...I...love....him..?

Me: NOW YOU HAVE TO BE WITH ICHIGO

Ichigo: this, I can live with

Rukia: *hugs him*

Me: ICHIRUKI FEELS COMPLETE. SHIP IS CANON IN MY OWN BOOK. MISSION COMPLETE *explodes*

Me: *comes back* hi

Everyone: the fuck

Me: I just said hi, now it's time to say byyyeeee cuz this chapter is over so byyyeeee