When You Stop Hating To Exist

It's not Piracy If It's Your Own Songs!!

Jessie had gone over to Holly’s without thinking twice about it.

She knew Holly would be there.
She had stopped at the grocery store to buy unflavored yoghurt and strawberry jam. Holly had mentioned that she liked them together and since Jessie had never tried it and kind of invited herself over she wanted to make up for it. Even if Holly said that no matter at what time or in what stage, Jessie could always knock on her door and she would open, Jessie still felt partially guilty.

Now she sat on Holly’s kitchen counter, eating the yoghurt while Holly explained the concept of her band’s new album. In Jessie’s eyes, Holly could have explained it much shorter.

You could sum it up with “Basically our Band’s name is bathroom themed and therefore this album is too. Plus we love unhinged and way too long titles so here it is,” but who was Jessie to complain.
The explanation could be a song title on the album too.
Their band was just a bunch of chaotic fucks who learned some instruments, found each other and now played together.
Jessie sometimes wished that she could see the band perform.
To see how Holly was on stage.

It made Jessie smile too, seeing Holly grinning, with her eyes wide open and all. She was so confident and honestly, Jessie wished she could be like her. Proud. Not hiding anything. Not ashamed. Fully herself.
Little did she know that Holly hid something from her too.

“Hey, like I really need to burn some CDs so that we can sell ‘em ‘n I don’t really wanna kick you out so like if you just wanna chill like while I do that that’s fine with me. Just put on some good show on the TV. Like I swear, if you put on the news I’ll personally rip your head off. Like I don’t care that you can easily overpower me. I’ll find a way don’t worry…” Holly had turned to her.

Jessie laughed about Holly ‘overpowering’ her. “I’d love to see you try,” Jessie grinned.

She would pay to see that. And because she did not need to pay, she simply needed to turn on the news channel she would do exactly that.

She would do exactly that and she would see how Holly imagined ‘overpowering’ Jessie. Holly put their bowls in the sink and they moved to Holly’s bedroom where her TV and her computer stood.

Jessie jumped onto the king sized bed. Holly who walked right behind her sighted at the view. Jessie smiling like a little kid in Holly’s sheets. It made her heart swell up looking at how petite Jessie looked in her bed. She wished that it could be more like that. That Jessie could smile more. There was always a hint of sadness or numbness in her eyes. Holly wondered if Jessie could talk about it. She hoped that Jessie had someone. She wondered if Jessie would tell her what was on her mind. And because Jessie looked so cute in the sheets Holly could not resist to join her.

Jessie, who still wanted to tease Holly, used the opportunity for a comment that she usually would have refrained from. However, it was Holly that she was talking about, and smelling her, sunken into her sheets made Jessie forget every ounce of self-respect that she had.
“I thought you needed to burn some CDs,”

Holly knew it was right. She knew that there was no logical reason to lay here other than simply laying in a bed with Jessie.

She shushed Jessie, “That can wait. You’re far cooler, I like you more.” [A/N: And with that, the homosexuality-meter just went off scale...]

They layed next to each other in silence, until one of them, this time Jessie, mastered up the courage to snuggle up against the other one. Jessie’s head on Hollys arm, her arm on Hollys waist, travelling down to the beginning her butt.
Slowly crawling her way onto Holly, only stopping once she could feel Hollys slightly too fast heartbeat.
She hesitated but because Holly showed no signs of disagreement, she placed her head on her breasts. At this point there was no going back, both could, not for their lives, explain how this had happened, what they had thought initiating this.