Red .. such a beautiful colour for many reasons.
It coats the feeling of being love and brings joy to those who experience.It appeases the eyes with the beauty of a rose, and the red flowers that sway in the wind as the sun beams the sky.
However,fo...
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Love isn't some feeling that comes and goes. It's one that stays.
I don't think I could ever know how to love someone the same way I love Mattheo. He is the first and last person I ever want to love like this and I can guarantee if his love for me isn't the way it seems.
It will shatter me for good.
I'd be lying if I said I hadn't loved before. I have... just not the same way.
I loved Theodore.
He felt like home. He was a warmth that once he enclosed you in there was no escape.Warmth wasn't something I was used to.I was brought up in a house where there wasn't love, so I can assume you will understand that it wasn't a comforting place at all.
Theodore gave me hope.He never left my side, he always gave me a chance even when I took him for granted he still stayed.
But the love wasn't the same.
It breaks my heart knowing his love for me was beyond what I had imagined, after reading his letter over and over again.. hearing his words of pain.. it could've killed me knowing I didn't feel nearly the same as he did.
I am hesitant to see him again.
If he comes to tonight's dinner I'm not sure how I will react. It's been a while.
I flex my hands that are rested at my side as I feel the sweat starting to form between my fingers.
Is it hot in here?
All of a sudden everything came flooding back all the memories, the pain, my words.
I wouldn't say I had forgotten everything I had done but i definitely downplayed it in my head.
I excused myself from Mattheos side telling him I needed to use the restroom. The boys hadn't arrived yet and with a worried hesitant glare he nodded and let me go.
Once I got to the rest room I closed the door and leaned against it taking deep breathes. God get yourself together.
I took a quick look in the mirror and practiced my smile before leaving the room.
The hallway was pretty quite so I'm assuming they aren't here yet.
"Sierra...."
I paused.
"Please.."
My chest started rising and falling at a rapid pace.I turned and glanced at the stairs that led to the basement.
