"ARE YOU SERIO-"
"Yeah I am, and I'm not even kidding you, and I'm not joking, And yes, I seriously kissed him, and to all your follow up questions Yes." I immediately told Jane.
I called her up an hour after Chase left. I told her I did something I shouldn't have done, and she came to my room right away. Now she's just repeating all kinds of questions asking if Im serious or something.
"I can't believe you." Jane said crossing her arms.
"Please don't be mad at me. I called you and I need your help. But tell me your opinion first." I begged.
She uncrossed her arms and stood up, then looked at the window seriously, then looked back at me.
"Are you kidding? Words cant explain how proud I am of you! You've overcame your-"
"You're PROUD of me?" My eyes widened.
"Yes? Who would've thought you'd move on so quick?" Jane said, her hand on her waist.
"Move on- What? That's not my point. I kissed Chase, and I'm not even sure James and I are over? How can you tell me you're proud of me moving on?" I said while sitting down.
"So your problem is, you still love James, but you're not sure if he just broke up with you, so you let your feelings take over your actions and you accidentally kissed Chase?" Jane said, crossing her arms.
"Wow. Yeah? Yeah I guess? Phew, you're actually right?" I said.
"If I'm right.... Wow, Tess, that's low."
"You think so?" I did not think this through. She's right; I did let my feelings take control over my actions.
"Yeah Tess, I never thought you'd go this far, or even start something like that, to begin with."
Okay. Ouch?
"Well what do you think should I do?" I asked.
"Its your call Tess, If you want to fix things with James first, go ahead, be honest. But if you want things to be clear with Chase, explain why you kissed him and left him clueless." Jane smiled.
"Geez. Who knew you had such great advices in you?" I sighed, "What would I ever do without you?"
"Yeah yeah I know I'm THE best, BEST FRIEND EVER, but I think you should think about what to do next, they cant wait forever for you!"
I hugged Jane and she left after a few goodbyes. Which means I'm all alone in my room again; flooding my mind with both necessary and unnecessary thoughts.
-
I changed my ratty old pajamas to some lazy clothes; joggers and a tank top with matching Nike Roshe Runs.
I've been at the same driveway for a good 10 minutes. I noticed I've been standing there too long when I snapped out of my thoughts, reminiscing the memories I shared with special people in my life.
"T?"
I jumped at the sound of his voice.
"Sweet baby jesus, you scared me!" I exclaimed.
"Sorry? What are you doing here, at my driveway?"
"I was just- wait, what are you doing here?" I defended.
"Its my driveway and- I asked first!"
I sighed. "Right. Can we talk, Chase?"
"Sure, you wanna come inside or wanna walk around the village?" Chase asked.
"You can pick Chase, I just really wanna talk to you." I smiled.
"Let's go inside then, I just ordered pizza."
We walked to his room, in awkward silence.
"Sit anywhere you'd like." Chase offered.
I smiled and took my usual place. His comfy chair with his comfy stuffed caterpillar.
"You never stopped loving that stuffed caterpillar huh?" Chase laughed.
"Yeah, same as I never stopped loving you." I said.
Chase's eyes widened.
"S-so, what did you want to talk to me about?" He stuttered. His eyes are so wide and ears are so red I could laugh hysterically, but can't cause maybe its disrespectful of me? Oh I don't know, I'm keeping all these in.
"I've made up my mind."
"And?" Chase's body stiffened.
"I'm sorry for kissing you, I never should have done that. At least, not now, after you came back from wherever you went to." I admitted.
Silence. I hear nothing but the background music playing at his room. For now, I'm thankful he still does his habit, turning on the speakers and playing a song every time he enters his room.
I was searching for his eyes, but his eyes are closed shut and I just looked away and looked around the room. From what I see, he hasn't changed quite a bit, he's still the same Chase in love with so much Genres of music, the same Chase who puts movie posters on his wall, even if he hasn't seen some of which are put, and the same Chase who stays silent when he's thinking.
I walked to the window and admired the view from his house and again, reminisced my memories with Chase and Jane and all our other friends-- who aren't our friends now.
Chase stood up and sighed. "And I'm sorry, too, that I thought you kissed me and felt the same way, but didn't."
