Unusual Troubles: A Separatist Commander (STBlackST x Star Wars: The Clone Wars)

Chapter 7: Unusual First Impression

—Muunilist—

Do you ever have those moments where your friends or colleagues embarrassed you in front of someone? Picture this as introducing your friend to your family or your love one to your parents for the first time and hoping that surely first impressions would be good?

Well...
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Things are not looking good for Ol' Richard at the moment.

"Mommy- I MEAN, Ma'am! I'm very sorry for my droid's behavior!" Richard stammered with his hands raised nervously at the Sith assassin.

In front of him stood Asajj Ventress, her face twisted with fury, glaring at him as if she could kill with a look. If looks could kill, he'd be long gone. This all stemmed from an inappropriate comment by Streak, and now Asajj had him at lightsaber-point, ready to strike.

Before his arrival, Streak narrowly avoided being chopped into pieces thanks to Richard, but the Odd Commander couldn't help but feel a sense of amusement at the droid's nonexistent face. If he had one, he would be grinning like an idiot. It seems being dominated by a sexy Sith assassin can activate unexpected neurons in someone's brain.

Or specifically a droids' processor.

"...Give me one reason why I shouldn't gut you and send this droid to the scrapyard?!" Ventress snarled at Richard as her lightsaber closed into Streak's neck.

"Oh, ho ho, that's hot!" Streak says teasingly.

Cue facepalming from his team and nearby droids.

"Shut it!" Ventress has a flustered look on her face from the droid's teasing. She's really eager to slice this droid into pieces or turn it to scrap right here and right now!

The Commander, meanwhile, is mentally screaming, like a TF2 Soldier screaming in terror.

After Richard regains his composure, he takes a deep breath and says, "...Because you might lose a valuable asset! I mean, I saw how you fought Streak, and you've got to admit, he has talent!"

"Absolutely, boss!" Streak gives a thumbs up.

"Quiet, Streak!" Richard snaps, "...and yes, I understand that you feel violated by my droid's behavior, but Streak is a valuable asset to the team in the war effort. He helped with the defense of Muunilist, and let me tell you, Streak is one of a kind! One that you don't see with regular battle droids!"

Ventress watches Richard closely, silently taking in his words. She won't admit it, but the commander of this infuriating droid is right. She saw how effective this droid was when she tried to slice it with her lightsaber after that 'Choke Me Mommy' comment, and she is still fuming from such vulgar words coming from a droid, of all things.

Perhaps Ventress never expected what came next from her 'fight,' especially one from a B1 Battle Droid.

—(Flashback)—

"Woah, hold up! You wouldn't want to mess up this handsome face, would you? Remember, I'm doing this all for you," Streak teased as Ventress swung her blade at the B1-Scout Droid.

The droid's words made her cringe and boil with anger.

"Silence! How dare you speak in such a disrespectful manner to your commander, droid! Do you want to be dismantled!?" Ventress threatened, holding her blade to Scout's neck, but the droid remained unfazed.

Despite the lightsaber so close to his neck, the droid sighed.

"I can't help it if I'm a smooth criminal. My looks have stolen many a girl's heart," Scout retorted.