The Unexpected Love

Ch 15- Alessio

Every time I search for death, I just reach her. Every time the alcohol fails, it's just her image that clouds my mind. It's as if I am being pushed into something.

I hadn't expected her to kiss me, scratch that, I hadn't even expected myself to kiss her. Sure, I fantasied about that for days but it wasn't a possibility I thought real. It's death sentence, her lips mean my ruin. And a taste of them addicting enough to make me walk straight into my destruction.

It wasn't like last time, I didn't come here to forget, but in fact remember something. For the past few days, the night I kidnapped her haunted my dreams. The night I argued with Nevio against the kidnapping because they didn't deserve it. The night my family would've died if he had listened to me. The night which is proof how my blood makes me harmful for my own family. For those who saved me.

Nevio didn't kidnap them for our safety, he just wanted to start a war, but it came to use anyway. What has my reluctance ever offered that his psychopathy didn't?

I wanted to hurt her, wanted to test myself. That day, Nevio would've hurt her to protect us, anyone else would've too. I? no, my knife comes to halt before it even reaches her. She was a sign of my weakness, a sign that I am unfit, not monstrous enough to be worthy. A sign that I am in fact not a true Falcone. Her unblemished skin mocks me because I left her that way and always would leave her like that.

I had a knife pointed at her twice now, she left unscathed both of the time. She always will.

I kicked the ground hard, sending pebbles flying. Incompetence. She reminded me of who I am. Forget hurting her, I even protected her. An enemy's daughter. Her father would've killed mine. And I fucking protected her.

I didn't know what I wanted to do when decided to come to her. But I was angry, I wanted to see my own weakness with my own eyes, wanted make it disappear. Wanted to see if I felt a shred of bloodlust looking at her, so I could hold on to that. But no. Innocent, kind, almost broken, not someone I could ever hurt. She had a knife at me too once, I let her draw blood, didn't bother, didn't fucking care, as long as it was her.

All I could muster in front of her was an angry kiss. My hands didn't choke her to death but brushed her arms instead. It wasn't her blood running down my fingers but her auburn hair twirling between them.

I released a harsh breath, settling onto the driving seat of my car. With a last glance at her college, as if it was her, I left.

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I woke up around 10 in the morning, in my room. The events of that day came back to me again, I doubt they ever left. That kiss was the first thing I think about since it happened and the last thing I sleep to.

The dreams...or the nightmares...I don't even know what would come now when I sleep, but it's always about her. It's almost some sort of karma that now she tortures my nights like this.

I checked my phone once, there weren't any texts from her. Wasn't she curious? Well unsettled would be more like it. Three days...three fucking days and nothing. Not a word...not even when I drunk texted her.

Well, it wasn't much, just a "Asleep?" But she was meant to reply, like she always did. She can't just pull back now.

I doubt I scared her or anything, for one she wanted it, and for second...no I don't have a second, the first is enough.

She feels like the kind pf person who will willingly go into danger. You know, like those horror movie characters. If the kiss proved anything, then it's that. She wouldn't just ignore my existence altogether; I doubt I'll let her.