Love's Charade

twenty five - travis

tw: vomit

Taylor cried for a long time. Curled up in my lap, her head on my thighs, her whole body shaking. I felt absolutely awful.

I didn't know how that asshole had got into our hotel room, but I felt so, so bad that this had happened to Taylor. I'd caught a glimpse of that video on Joe's phone before looking away, and it had been the worst thing I had ever seen. Taylor had obviously been held down against her will, and I wanted to break that fucking asshole's neck for doing that to her. She was broken in my arms, sobbing, hurt. 

I stroked her hair, not knowing what else to do. She'd freaked out when I'd touched her earlier, so I didn't want to push her too far. I just sat against the wall, running my hands through her blonde strands, thinking.

I couldn't leave her now. Taylor had gone through so much shit, and now this had hit her. I didn't want to leave her by herself, but god, I'd already signed that deal. I was leaving soon whether I liked it or not.

"I'm so sorry sweetheart." I whispered as I rubbed a thumb over her cheek. "I'm so sorry."

"It's..." Taylor hiccupped. "It's not your...fault." She sniffed, rolling over and looking up at me. Her eyes were red and raw, blinking tiredly from crying so much. "Thank you for trusting me." She mumbled. "With him earlier. Thank you for letting me do that. I didn't know what else to do."

"Of course." I cupped her face gently. "It was hard sweetheart, but I trusted your judgement. And I'm sorry he did that to do." 

"I love you." Taylor sniffled, wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry my life is such a mess."

"Hey, no." I shook my head. "I love you too. And both of us are a little messy sometimes, and that's okay. I love you, and I'll love you despite anything. Okay sweet girl?"

"Okay." Taylor whispered. Then she sighed. "Can we go to bed now? I just want to sleep."

I nodded, and Taylor lifted her head. I helped her to her feet, trying not to touch her anywhere but her hands. She was still fragile, and I just wanted to be there for her. Scrubbing at her eyes, Taylor let me lead her back into the hotel room. I locked the door, jiggling the handle to make sure before turning around. Taylor was changing into a pair of sweatpants and one of my hoodies, tugging the fabric over her body. She looked so broken as she climbed into bed, curling up in a ball.

My heart breaking at the sight, I turned off the light and went over to the bed, sitting down. Taylor rolled towards me, reaching out with both arms like a baby.

"Are you sure sweetheart?" I paused, not sure if touching her was really a good idea.

"Please." She whispered. "I need to know I'm not alone."

"You're never alone." I assured her, lying down next to my girlfriend and letting her wrap herself around me. Taylor cuddled close and ducked her face into my neck, sliding her legs through mine. I hugged her close, resting my arms around her back. 

I couldn't sleep for hours. Taylor seemed to calm down and drift off after a little while, but I was too tensed up to even think about sleep. I was worried that if I went to sleep, I wouldn't be there for her. Instead of worrying about getting rest, I just stayed up and kept an eye on Taylor. She seemed alright, shifting a little in her sleep but not waking up. But eventually, I fell asleep around one in the morning.

When I woke up, it was to the sound of someone throwing up. Lifting my head, I blinked myself awake and looked around. Taylor was gone, the bathroom door wide open. Then I put the pieces together and got to my feet, rushing into the bathroom.