ʟɪʟɪᴀɴᴀ ɢᴀʟʟᴀɢʜᴇʀ || ꜱʜᴀᴍᴇʟᴇꜱꜱ

ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ'ꜱ ᴀ ᴡɪʟʟ

"Thank you all for coming out in honor of Aunt Ginger. GG as I called her." The Gallaghers, cousin, said as they all stood outside for Aunt Ginger's "memorial."

"You now, when the guy at the funeral place handed me her ashes, I thought, what the hell do I do with these? Put them in a vase on my mantle? Or scatter them at the park or the lake? Then I thought, no, I know where she was happiest." Cousin Patrick said as they all stared at him.

"On this corner, her corner, where she turned tricks in her 20s and 30s." He added.

"And 60s!" Frank piped in.

"She did magic tricks?" Carl asked.

"No, no, no, son. Turning tricks is a euphemism for prostitution. In her day, your great aunt was a legendary pole smoker. Could unlock her jaw like a Burmese python." Frank added.

"We are at her funeral." Jimmy said.

"You know, some think Gallaghers don't have a work ethic, but Ginger worked this corner rain, sleet, snow, her old knees hitting that hard pavement again and again. Bertie Giddelman is the only one that's outlasted her." Frank said pointing at the woman. Lily shook her head trying not to smile.

"Look, you all knew Ginger, so I ain't gonna sugarcoat it. She was a mean old bitch. But even a mean old bitch deserves a send off. Here, here. So this is us, Ginger, sending you off, right where you belong." Cousin Patrick said spreading her "ashes" from an old box.

"It's touching."

"I'm tearing up."

"Okay, kids, let's go." Patrick told his kids as they started to leave.

"Patrick." Fiona called out, "so Ginger had a will that we didn't know about, and you just had it sitting in a drawer?"

"Yep."

"And even though she hated your guts, she left our house to you?" Lily asked, her and Fiona and Lip were face to face with their cousin.

"It was never your house."

"It's weird, you know, how she signed the will only a year ago, you know, her being an invalid and all." Lip explained trying to see his point of view. "Signed and notarized." Patrick answered.

"I don't remember you coming by with a lawyer." Lily said.

"I gotta get back to my family." Patrick said going to leave.

"Seven kids with nowhere else to go." Lily told him by stopping him. "Why don't we talk about this when the sting of losing Ginger has worn off, hmm? Tomorrow, maybe?" Patrick suggested as he left.

Lily let out a sigh before looking at Lip and Fiona. "You want to tell them or should I?" Lip asked looking at his two older sisters.

- - -

The Gallaghers were back home after the whole fiasco of Aunt Ginger's funeral and Cousin Patrick being an ass towards them. Now they have to think of a way to get the house back and with Frank's ranting it only annoyed them.

"You appreciate the irony, right? Senseless arguments about who gets what bedroom, refusing to allow me to stay. Now, nobody gets to stay." Frank said making them all roll their eyes.

"Why is Frank here again?" Lily asked making a face to Frank as he did the same face to her.

"There's a small chance he'll be able to help since he's known Patrick longer than any of us." Fiona said as they all sat around the table.

"Patrick wants to steal our house?"

"He's a contractor. He's gonna flip it. Slap a coat of paint on it, call it a cozy, authentic pre-war, and offload it to yuppies." Lip answered, Lily served herself some coffee before remembering she can't drink any.