Don't wake me up, not just yet.- Anderperry

5

Everyone is fast asleep and I stood in front of the bathroom mirror with a blade on my hand. I wasn't going to cut my wrists, no. I was going to slice my neck open.

And I stood face to face with myself, looking directly into my own eyes as I pressed the blade slightly, not enough to cut through just yet. I was breathing heavily, so heavily and I was contemplating whether this was worth it or not. I could feel a tear in my eye as important people rushed in my head. People like Mr. Keating, Charlie Dalton(somewhat 2nd best friend), my brother even if our parents y'know. People like that and sure they're out of the hell-hole Welton, They're alive and I could still see them during break.

I closed my eyes and thought, blade still pressed on my skin. And for a few minutes filled with silence, filled of agonizing thoughts of having to decide, I heard a bang which made my eyes jolt open. In front of me, in the mirror, was no longer me. It was Neil.

He was banging on the door, crying and mouthing no as he couldn't speak. How could he be here? I'm not dreaming am I? I was goddamn hallucinating, great.

"You aren't real!" I said to the man in the mirror, but he did look so real. So convincing that it made me want to slowly pull out the blade but I didn't and only pressed it in harder, drawing a tiny bit of blood.

As I did that the banging on the mirror grew louder, his face turning more scared and frustrated. "Are you real?" I asked and it nodded truculently as it kept banging on the window.

So I pulled it away, look once more on the mirror and decided I should just sleep it off. I'm already hallucinating gosh.

"See you in my dreams, Neil." I said and went to bed. And I wondered if I would still meet him since I already saw him. But I hoped I would.

Why was he stopping me anyway? He killed himself so why can't I?. So why can't I? And I furiously forced myself to bed, squeezing my eyes shut. And to no surprise I did not dream of Neil tonight.