Shutout

Chapter 30 - Logan

When I let myself into Kane's apartment, the tv is on a bit too loud. But the noise level makes what he's watching evident. 

He's curled up into two different throw blankets, staring intently at the TV. Harold is perched on the kitchen island like he's trying to get a good view of the TV, too. Kane doesn't acknowledge me as I plop down on the couch next to him, so I press a kiss to his cheek and tug on one of the blankets he's wearing. Luckily, he let me in so that we could sit arm to arm under blankets. 

"How much have I missed?" I whispered, though, that I should talk loudly so he could hear it over the TV volume.

"Like five minutes. Shhh," Even though he is silencing me and won't look away from the TV, Kane searches for my hand and grips it.

So I quieted down and watched the press conference being aired on CBS Sports. Liam Lindalh sits behind a table with a deep blue fabric cloth over it. The background is the Toronto Maple Leafs press background, where it's just the logo over and over. He's wearing a Tronto Maple Leaf ball cap, slightly shading his eyes but not enough to hide him. 

"—I would like to reiterate that I am grateful for my time in the league and with my teams. I have been extremely fortunate with the lucky and gifts i have been given over my life. I simply wish to see a change so that young hockey players and fans do not have the same kind of experience I have had. I would like to thank my...mom for always supporting me and the men and women who makeup both the Tronto Maple Leafs club and fanbase, as well as the people who supported me in Anaheim. I want to thank Shane Youngman, Cobin Lowe, and Logan Klicker for sharing their experiences with the world so that we can make a change. And I would like to thank Kane Jenkins for writing this article with the intention of only validating us—"

Kane shakes our connected hands under the blanket, "That's us." I laugh. 

"Now," A woman, who must be Tronto's PR head, steps into the shot and addresses the audience that is not in the camera, "Mr. Lindalh will answer a few questions. I would like to remind you of the guidelines and rules about questions that were released prior to the press conference—"

"I got a copy," Kane mentions, "It's pretty detailed. They can't ask about his family."

"—If any question violates the guidelines or is simply offensive to Mr. Lindalh, he is not obligated to answer it. Please keep the questions short and clear. Mr. Lindalh? Shall we begin?"

Liam clears his throat and nods, kind of jerkily that gives away his nerves. He is more nervous than he appears, I bet. But I'd be hypocritical. I'm buzzing with nerves for my own press conference and i have like eight hours before i have to do anything. 

The PR woman chose someone from the crowd that was rowdy. It instantly quiets down so that the question can be heard, and all other journalists can mooch off it, "If hockey is so negative and homophobic, why do you play? Why did you ever go pro when you knew you would be subjected to media and fan comments?"

Liam places his hands on the very edge of the table, where his wrists are leaning off the edge. He interwines them and then flexes them. His Adam's apple bobbed with a thick swallow before he spoke into the grey microphone again, "Hockey has always been a sort of safe space for me. It is somewhere where I can take out all my emotions and put them towards something productive and inspiring. Although when I was young, I could see some of the ways that people in sports treat people who are gay and bisexual, I never saw too much detail, or I simply didn't pay enough attention. It wasn't until I was pro and very clear with my sexuality that I began to see the mistreatment and systematic...shame towards sexuality in professional hockey. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is I went pro because I love the sport and love who it makes me. All the benefits outweighed the problems I could see or experience. And I never intended to come out, so I never worried about media or fans until it was too late."