Patent Blanks

3 Fall With The Breaks

To call my situation a downward spiral is a loose definition, I have never in my life felt this low. This is a fitting rock bottom, yet I don't think I was anywhere near ready this time.

I feel It was partly my fault. XiXi's mother wanted me to stay away from Roche, yet he was my comfort. I haven't seen Xiao since because of me...

My earliest memory of Roche and XiXi was when we were 5, when we met. During school we had a hard time. In elementary and middle school we just had each other, but in highschool, we met more people, and got mentally unstable.

While juggling all of that and having to keep good grades, and make sure I look at my peak emoness so I can feed into popularity, I didn't know what to do. I was helpless back then.

After graduating things eased up, like it did during the summer, but none of us had any plans for our lives after that.

Roche sat with me on my bed, trying to comfort me as best as he could. His red and black hair tied up into a loose bun, he wore my clothes.

"Miley, are you sure you're okay?" He asks, his light blue eyes looked as if they were shining in the soft dim light of my room. He looked at me with the sweetest expression.

"My stomach hurts?" I replied, giving him a guilty smile.

"You know what I mean..." He shut down my joke immediately, I couldn't look him in the eye. He scooted himself closer to me, hugging me while we sat on my bed.

"I don't know how I feel..." I mumbled, I should've been used to him hugging me close like this, yet it's special every time. I was always glad we could be close without confronting our feelings for eachother.

"Why can't we just be close like this without XiXi's mom knowing?" He asked softly, I could tell he was trying to help. I laid my head on his shoulder, closing my eyes to calm down.

"She's my neighbour, Rockie. She's basically stalking me trying to catch me kissing a boy. She thinks we're leaving XiXi out." I said in a complaining tone. Why did she have to be so unreasonable?

I looked away sniffing, my hair falling in my eyes, Rockie moving my hair behind my ear, he hugged me tighter.

It's as if he knew I loved him.

"And- Your parents don't even believe she's stalking you...?"

"Yeah."

"So what are we supposed to do to get her away?"

"Right now I just want you near me..." I mumbled, I thought he couldn't hear me, but he looked at me in my eyes, his normally bloodless looking skin reddened, his shoulders tensing up.

"I'll be here with you even when we're forced apart. I will never let her hurt you." He whispered into my ear, sweetly kissing me on the cheek.

I lifted my head in shock, just staring at him for a moment. I looked into his eyes, as I saw him look at my lips repeatedly. As soon as I looked him in the eye he gently cupped my face and kissed me.

As he pulled back my face was burning, my heart was pounding. I could feel his warm breath on my face, I could tell I looked like a flustered mess. My heart swelled with my love for him. I felt that if I waited to love him I'd die... But if I do love him, we might both die.

He sensed my worry, hugging me again. My breath slowly calmed.

"Shit." I whispered in a sigh.

"Hm? What's wrong Miley?" He whispered back, moving himself to where he's just hugging my waist, looking in my eyes.

"What are we supposed to do now... We can't go back to normal like this!" My eyes teared up, we crossed the line we were never supposed to get to, even if it's the best thing that came out of my last year as a teenager. "I CANNOT face you like this never happened..." I talked without thinking, letting my thoughts be said.

"I love you..." Roche whispered, his light blue

eyes staring directly into mine. This was horrible. I knew this was inevitable, but I knew it would go nowhere.

I stayed silent, staring at him, I finally started crying, Rockie tried to comfort me immediately. I didn't want him to say it, because I knew I'd instantly say it back.

I cried myself to sleep that night. He held the back of my hand, I could feel a rough patch on his wrist, I cried for so many reasons then. I made a mental list in my mind of the reasons to make myself fall asleep.

Rockie stayed at my side the entire night, hugging me while I slept. My hair tangled into his, making a black, blonde, and red hair blob.

That was the best sleep I think I've ever gotten, even better than the hotels you go to for rich kid slumber birthday parties. Being in his arms, I finally rested.