Lost and Found

Chapter Ten

Harper and I graduated from high school on May 28th. I celebrated by getting absolutely shitfaced on expensive wine. I was still seventeen, but I was free from high school. Summer had come, and Will and I had continued our affair, if it was to be called that. It was June, and I had shown up at his window, my hair drenched from the rain, my clothes were stuck to my body, showing my skin through them. When I swung my legs over his window, it was with the need of warmth. I shed my shirt and sweatpants, revealing my bar breasts, and black underwear. Will, was leaning against his dresser, he smiled seeing my naked body. From his dresser drawer, he produced a pack of cigarettes. He tossed it to me, making his way toward me and handing me a lighter. As I lit the cigarette and went to sit on his bed, he wrapped a blanket around my shoulders.

"You're wet." He said, lighting his own cigarette.

"Is that a come on?" I asked him. He smirked, and then leaned in to kiss me. He tasted like smoke, and when he breathed, smoke drizzled off his lips. I smiled, he went to put both of our cigarettes out on an ashtray. Then, he slid his hand past my underwear, and sank them against my clit. He began moving them back and forth. I gasped, and tried to keep from moaning while he increased the pace. His other hand moved to cover one of my breasts. In between heavy kisses he pulled away from me, my nails were dug into his shoulders. His face was flushed as he looked down at me.

"I love you." He said. When he said that, my body broke open into a million pieces around his fingers. I arched my back, and my legs quaked with pleasure.

"Fuckk." I moaned, as i got the sweet release I missed everytime I wasn't with him. He withdrew his fingers, and rolled from on top of me. As I allowed my body to come off my high, I looked at him.

"I love you too you know." I said, my voice low and tired. He nodded. Running a hand over his cock through his boxers.

"Prove it." He said.

So I did, I slid onto my knees on the floor, my hands pulling off his underwear, as I slid one of my hands along the shaft of his dick. He exhaled, and leaned back on his forearms. But before I moved again, I saw something flicker in my peripheral vision. I don't really know, how long Jacob had been standing in the doorway before he said something.

"Will?" He asked, his voice choked. I scrambled to my feet, and I yanked myself away from Will. Jacob's eyes widened seeing my face. Then, he slammed the door behind him. I tried in vain to locate my clothes while I refused to make eye contact with Will who was doing the same. Once my shirt was halfway on my body, I left Will standing in darkness, to go find Jacob. When I did find him, he was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. When he saw me, he averted his eyes. I leaned against his doorframe. Long silence passed.

"Say something." I whispered. He looked up at me, my hair messy, and I didn't just look like I'd been having sex, I looked like I'd been through world war two. He sighed.

"go." he said, his voice laced with anger.

"Jacob-I can explain." But I couldn't, I couldn't explain, there was nothing to explain, I had no excuse, just lies.

"Aaliyah. Just fucking go." He said, still not looking a me. So I did, I walked down the stairs and out the door. Into the pouring rain, I didn't even bother shielding myself from it, I deserved the storm.

It had been a month, a whole month. It was July now, and I was depressed. I hadn't moved from bed in weeks, I hadn't spoken to anyone in weeks. I had showered, but that was because I hated being dirty, physically anyway. I ate what my mom brought me, and sometimes Harper would set a gatorade on my nightstand. But it wasn't until Harper asked me:
"Maybe your depressed because your going to get your period."