Love, insecurity and pain

Only Me

My eyes darted around
the room to find people
laughing at jokes and
children jumping in joy.

The room was bright
and loud with life in it,
while I was grim and
dead silent inside.

I wonder how they
all are so happy,
while my soul rots
in loneliness.

What keeps them so
alive i thought
and me so dead in
a living corpse.

Then I realised that only
i can make me happy
even if the god tried,

and only my mind
can let me heal even
if i have the medicines.