within his walls~ l.ackerman ff

3. meetings

Arriving home, I was eager to start getting ready to go to Hange's. This was the first time I had hung out with someone from my school in ages. Porco still wasn't talking to me much however, and when he did it was dry. I really couldn't be asked to put up with his shit anymore, as I had more important things to focus on at the moment. He was in a dickish faze, one that over time he would grow out of. It's not that he was abusive, more insecure and that would turn into toxicity. Breaking up with him was never a good solution however, because I was scared of him tainting my reputation with all my old friends, as I still saw some of them regularly. Me and Sasha even went shopping in the holidays. But other than that, when he cared, Porco really did care.
I chose to wear an oversized T-shirt I had bought from a concert, and a pair of black shorts. It wasn't too crazy of an outfit and still comfortable.

I made my way to Hange's which was a bit further than school so I had to drive there. I was second to arrive, second only to Levi, so for ten minutes it was just me, Hange and Levi before Moblit and Erwin came back from their sports practice.
Hange tried to keep me included as much as she could, but it was a bit difficult as it seemed like today Levi was just out to get me. Thank god it didn't take too long for Erwin and Moblit arrived, with snacks as well.
"Hey Y/N, you haven't really told us much about yourself. Why don't you?" Erwin asked.
"Uh okay then. I went to the same elementary school as Hange growing up, however different middle schools and then the same high school and have still stayed close throughout then. I have a boyfriend," Hange interrupted.
"Ugh not Porco."
"Yes Porco."
"What's wrong with Porco?" Moblit asked.
"Well I respect whoever Y/N likes, but that does NOT mean I have to like them. I respect her decisions and her wanting to be happy but Porco is a dickhead."
"No seriously he's not that bad, Hange. He's just a bit immature sometimes."
"Sounds like you need someone better for you. Say hypothetically, Porco didn't exist. Who in this school would you want to date the most?" Erwin asked me, with a sneaky look on his face, hoping to get something out of me.
My first thought was Levi, but he was sitting right across from me, eating a slice of pizza. I couldn't say his name out loud, first of all he would hear me, second of all he would probably tell me to jump up my own ass and die, and third of all Hange and the others would go even crazier than they normally would.
"Erm well, none of the boys in this school are crazy attractive you know, there really aren't many to choose from."
"You're right on that one. That's why I choose to stay single. None of the boys in our high school even matter to me." Hange scoffed.
"Yup" I agreed, laughing.
"Hey guys can we take a photo? I want to update my story." Hange asked.
"Yeah of course."
"Sure!"
"Yeah definitely."
"Really?"
"Yes Levi, really."
"Fine."
We all posed simultaneously, as Hange brought out her phone. Except Levi of course- he kinda of just, sat there.
"Thanks guys! It looks great! Do you all want to come see?"
"Send that to the group chat Hange."
"It looks so good! You're great at photography." Moblit complimented, rubbing Hange's hair with his hand.
"Thanks Moblit." Hange replied, staring up at him on the sofa.
Around an hour passed, everyone was laughing and having fun. We had played a few different video games on Hange's Playstation and I won multiple times. It really felt like I was becoming more comfortable around them and so did they. Everything was going great, until my phone lit up with an incoming call.
"Hey guys do you mind if I take this really quick?"
"Yeah of course!"
~

"Hey, are you okay?"
"Who the fuck do you think you are? We have one disagreement and now you're prancing about with 50 other boys?"
"Excuse me?"
"You fucking heard me."
"Yeah I did, and Im in disbelief. You really are a cunt sometimes Porco, you know that right?"
"I don't care what I am, you can call me whatever you want. You're mine and I don't want to see you hand in hand with boys who are only friends with you to get in your pants!"
"Yeah because you're fucking one to talk about getting in my pants aren't you Porky?"
"Fuck you, you're my girlfriend and I don't want to be known as the guy who goes dating easy girls do I?"
"Am I making you feel sick? Is what I'm doing threatening your precious masculinity? I wasn't the easy one when you were begging to feel me the other week, was I? You're a hollow, cruel person. You don't have any power over me. Don't even try act like you do, because your manipulation isn't going to work on me anymore."
"Oh but me and you both know that it always will work. No matter how much you push me away or try to forget about us, the only way you will truely move on is if I'm dead. And over my dead body will I ever let a girl like you go."
"Thought I was easy though, hm?"
"Come on love you know how easily I change my mind."
"No. Porco I'm not dealing with your shit anymore."
"I don't care. To me we aren't done and that's what matters. Whether what we have is casual or committed I'm always going to be the one you want."
"Have you ever been less self absorbed? You can pick and choose whether I matter to you, when you want to be my boyfriend or you'd rather be a stranger despite telling me that you'd prove that cannibalism is a metaphor for love just for me. You can tell me you're devoted to me and that you'd go to hell and back just for me, that you'd rather watch everyone around you suffer than watch me go through any ounce of pain. Because that's what you do Porco, you say all this beautiful shit and dedicate yourself to me, only for the next day to treat me like I'm just someone that is empty. Guess what? I do have fucking feelings. What you do is the stuff I'd never dream of having to experience. I've never felt less of a human in my life except when I'm around you."
"I can hear you now, and I'm picturing how gorgeous you look."
"Is it like what I say just goes through one ear and out the other?"
"No, love. I'm hearing you."
"Then fucking say something!"
"I've heard everything I need to hear. I know how I can change. How I can be the one for you. I promise you."
"No. Please understand that after this we are done."
"I think that's something that you need to understand. You love me, you're obsessed with me, you can't live without me."
"You're wrong. Please leave me, block me, just something."
"I can't. I need to touch your skin one last time before I can even consider letting you go."
"You say all of this but if I let you back into my life you will be out as soon as possible."
"Come on love, that's not very fair is it?"
Suddenly, my phone left my hand and the shit spewing from Porco's mouth was inaudible.
"Listen here, I don't know who the fuck you are but you're a sick man. Please get some fucking help and leave Y/N alone. You're a shitty person and a fucking horribly raised human being. Teach yourself how to be a better fucking human and if you try anything with her again i'll deal with your bull shit myself."
I heard Porco's raised voice begin but then was quickly cut off by Levi's finger hitting the end call button. I stared at him in disbelief. He stared back at me with his usual cold gaze but this time was softened with a feeling of sympathy. I just sat there, after he left, just wondering what the fuck happened.