O' C O N N O R🍂
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6:15am"Me versus me enuh, only competition" I nod my head and close my eyes to the intro of Mirror by Masicka.
"Mi gun load, di real ones dem a dead straight
Mi feel mi demons dem a escape
Look weh di weed a do mi chest plate
Remember yuh dream fi own a estate"I settle onto the balcony, the soft glow of the rising sun casting a warm hue over my features. With a cigarette between my fingers and a glass of Gin in hand, I close my eyes, allowing the gentle cool breeze to carry me back to the depths of my past.
Ruffling my hair I bring the cigarette to my lips, heaving a sigh, I take a drag.
Exhaling, the smoke gracefully dissipates, leaving behind a faint scent. It's like a fleeting moment of escape, a temporary respite from this world.
Reaching for my pocket I take out my phone. The screen flickered to life, illuminating my face as I caught a glimpse of my reflection. In that moment, time seemed to stand still, as if the mirror of the phone held a portal to my history.
My eyes, once filled with innocence, now holds a glimmer of both strength and vulnerability. The reflection in the phone becomes a silent witness to the choices I've made and the paths I've taken some I regret and some I don't.
Rising from my plush seat, my steps carry me towards the mirror. My eyes fixate on the reflective surface, anticipation building within me.
Staring in the mirror I reflect on my life and I feel like I am in a different place now. I'm not the little boy who cried about his father's passing almost twelve years ago.
With my arms outstretched I reach to touch the glass, hoping to bridge the divide between the past and the present. The mirror seemed to hold a whispered promise, a chance for redemption and transformation. It whispered of the possibility of breaking free from the chains of my ancestry, forging a new path filled with light and hope.
The scars and old bullet wounds etched on my arms and stomach told tales of my past, a legacy of power and control that coursed through my veins.
I had to grow up fast, way before my desired time. Life dealt me a tough card, and I had to learn the ropes of the streets at a young age. With no one to rely on but myself , I had to become a man before I even knew what it truly meant. I had to navigate the treacherous world of badness, where power and money were everything.
My childhood was robbed from me but with all that has happened I have learnt patience and silence.
Knowing that I had to provide for my family "it didn't take long for me to choose gun over Bible Study"
It's like a storm brewing inside, a whirlwind of conflicting thoughts and desires. On one hand, there's a sense of liberation and relief, a glimmer of hope that I can break free from the chains that bind me.
But at the same time, there's a lingering heaviness, a weight of uncertainty and fear. It's like standing on the edge of a precipice, teetering between the known and the unknown.
When would I have imagined I would have picked up so many enemies, eager to take my life at first glance.
Mi wish mi coulda give back all a dis in exchange fi mi childhood and joy.
Even if it is the last thing I will accomplish, I woulda go to the ends of the earth to kill Rowan.
The path ahead was uncertain, but armed with my pen, my gun and the strength of my words, I was prepared to face the shadows and weave a tale that would transcend time itself.
Psalms 145:9 The LORD is good to all: and his tender mercies are over all his works.
"Look like Jah-Jah forget mi, mi blessing well late"
"No Jah-Jah, yuh got mi, yuh never yet late" the song becomes relatable.
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Stepping in the kitchen I enter my wine cellar in search of Hennessy but hiss when I see that none is there.
Checking the refrigerator for Hennessy I feel a tinge of joy when I realize that the bottle has contents, a chain of expletives leave my mouth when I realize that the Hennessy is frozen.
Rum cya freeze, a muss Khajeel.
Heading to the living room I hear Khajeel singing and a female voice seemingly whispering and cheering him on, upon entering I glimpse Khaj on the couch playing Call of duty on the television, with his laptop playing 10 outta 10 by Masicka and his phone propped up on the couch.
"Who dat" I made my presence known raising my left eyebrow.
"Easy nuh bro" he chuckles throwing the other controller to me clearly startled.
Khajeel is my cousin, more like my brother at this point. He is in his last year of high school and he wants to study to be a real estate agent.
He is on break from school and a fi mi yard him find first.
Heart of Love stillz
Illuminate
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Thoughts?💭
Sorry I took long..✨
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