Guilty as Sin?: Remus Lupin x Y/N (Book 2)

Line Without a Hook

"All my emotions feel like explosions when you are around...If I could take it all back, I swear I would pull you from the tide"

-

Dinner at the Great Hall had become Y/N's favourite time of day. Her professors weren't focusing on her (McGonagall's eagle watch combined with Snape's knowing look both threatened to make her break character) and everyone else was so focused on their food or their daily catch-ups to focus on her. In the middle of eating, Dumbledore stood up and made his way to the golden lectern.

"Silence!" The entire room obeyed his command, not needing to be told twice. "I apologise for the interruption to your meal, but I have an announcement. This year, we have decided to have a Christmas ball! It will take place on the last day before the break, and if attending, you are all, staff and students, expected to arrive in black tie, formal wear. That is all."

The hall broke out in half excited, half confused whispers. Y/N's thoughts rushed- what was going on in Dumbledore's mind? Did he really think that now was the time for a stupid ball? And, of course, Y/N would be expected to attend as Olivia. She clenched her jaw at the thought, trying to stop herself from rolling her eyes, before her eyes locked onto Harry across the hall. She could tell from his face that he was hurt, and more confused than anyone else in the room. Her heart went out to him- she knew that he was struggling with Dumbledore's lack of interest and little time for him at the present moment, and yet he had the time to throw a ball for the entire school? Y/N wished that she could talk to him, comfort him, but it was not her place to explain Dumbledore's actions, even if she did have any answers, and it was definitely not Olivia's place. 

-

An hour before her detention, Y/N decided to go for a walk, needing the fresh air to help clear her thoughts. She hadn't realised where she was walking, until she found herself at the bridge. She let out a laugh- of course she had ended up here. 

The reality of everything began to sink in, fearing her evening. Could she bring herself to go back to that sickeningly pink room and use that quill again? Her hand still hadn't stopped bleeding from this morning, and her tiredness had come back with a vengeance. She had hoped that her night of recuperation with... him, would help, but given that she did an all-nighter, any progress her body and mind her made had swiftly been undone. She felt herself sink to the floor, arms wrapping around her knees that were pulled to her chest. Her head fell onto her knees as her body began trembling with emotion and exhaustion, the tears unable to summon the energy to fall.

"Hey." His voice was quite possible the only sound that could have snapped her out of the trance she had found herself in. Her head snapped up to look at Remus, who was crouched in front of her, reminding her with a jolt of the other night. Y/N felt trapped. Part of her wanted his arms around her, and the other part wanted to run and hide.

The second half won out, and she pushed herself to her feet with all her effort, Remus mirroring her and standing in front of her. She went to side step around him, but he was too quick, and once again she found herself trapped in front of him. 

"Did I do something? I thought that, after the other night, I mean-"

"The other night was a mistake." Y/N interrupted him, unable to meet his eyes. 

The words hurt Remus, he would be lying if he said otherwise. But he knew the girl in front of him too well. 

"We both know that it wasn't, Y/N."

She stood in front of him, arms crossed, hands rubbing her arms insecurely. She didn't know what to say, flashes of their laughter from when they had been them springing to mind out of nowhere. She chose to do what she had begun to do a lot every time they spoke, and ignored the current topic of conversation, opting for a change in topic instead.