Manual Of The Forbidden - Ryeji

Chapter 28

So I dedicated myself to listening to the song. There was something that called me, like the first time, something in those words coming out of Finneas' mouth that said my name.

I stayed still, silent. All my senses were now focused on that melody, on the lyrics, on thinking that she had written it thinking of me.

My legs wobbled and I felt weak. They were the words of the woman I loved, they were the feelings that I had never recognized. But, what if it wasn't like I thought? What if that song wasn't about me but about... Lia?

Thoughts began to collide in my head, causing complete chaos. Doubts began to torment me cruelly, would she be thinking of me? Would she miss me? Did she love me? I wished to put my hands on my head to try to silence the voices in my mind, but I just stayed still.

There was something in that song that screamed my name, I was sure of it. But I didn't want to seem foolish and make crude illusions even though my heart was broken and the abyssal pain in my chest.

I felt my eyes moisten. I wished I had the answer, to have some kind of power or magic that would show me what I wanted to know.

I felt... as if I still lived in London and she... was next to me.

My head began to spin, asking for a reason why I shouldn't listen to her anymore, but my heart, beating painfully against my chest, begged me to let it stay there, that even feeling pain, it liked the memories.

I didn't know who to obey, both were so strong and I was so weak, but then something stirred within me.

The wild thing that I thought no longer existed, moved cautiously within me, listening attentively to every word in that song, and I could no longer fight against it, it had become just as vulnerable as me, but that was the point, both of us were and neither of us had the strength to beat the other.

I just stood there, listening, motionless, until I felt a tear fall from my eye and run down my cheek.

At least one thing made me happy, her dream had come true, her songs had been played by an artist, at least she was happy, right?

Suddenly I was overwhelmed with curiosity, where is she? And Lia? Are they still together?

Then I let out another couple of tears. That song was the only thing that spoke to me about Ryujin and I wasn't sure what it was telling me.

I didn't know what time Eunwoo arrived and stood by my side. He barely looked at me.

—How many photos have you taken?— he asked, but I didn't answer. Then he really looked at me and noticed the wet trail left by the tears. —What's wrong?— he asked, visibly worried.

—It's her song,— I muttered without taking my eyes off the artist on stage.

—Her song?— he repeated, not understanding.

Since the day I arrived and told Eunwoo everything, I hadn't mentioned anything about Ryujin and Lia's story, even though I carried it with me day and night, ingrained in my skin and couldn't get it out of my head.

—She writes songs,— I mumbled. —She's a songwriter,— I assumed. —And that's her song.—

—Have you ever heard her play it?

Does he really believe it wasn't true?

—Look at the screen,— I said. —The author's name,— I specified.

Eunwoo did, the song was just ending.

—Shin Ryujin?— he asked without understanding. After a short silence, he opened his eyes and looked at me. —Shin Ryujin!— he exclaimed, remembering.