Saving Lives

The Decision

"We've already talked about this extensively Zora. Gabriel expressed that he didn't want anymore children any time soon and you know I don't want any period."  Zora placed a cup of steaming hot lemon tea in front of Raichelle and sat down across from her. She scooped two tablespoons of sugar and and swirled it around with her spoon. " Your not thinking of getting an abortion are you? Rai babies are a blessing, even if they are a surprise." Raichelle rubbed her hands over her face roughly. "I don't want to have an abortion, but I'm overwhelmed with the ones we got and I know he doesn't want any right now. He's gonna flip and I know it." Rai said putting both her hands on the tea cup to check the temperature. She used the saucer and the handle to bring it to her lips. She blew the gently to attempt to cool it down a bit before taking a sip to taste it. It was a little bitter so she grabbed the small sugar spoon and scooped a large heap into her cup and stirred it with the spoon Zora left in the tea cup. She then took the tea bag out and put it on the saucer. "You got some creamer?" One of Zora eyebrows went up. "Coming right up ms.english tea drinker." She said giggling as she stood to go get the creamer from the kitchen. Raichelle had gotten three abortions in the last two years, so she decided to get the IUD so she wouldn't get pregnant for the next five years. The thought of going through another one by herself gave her anxiety. She shook her head as she recalled the last time she was pregnant and decided not to keep it because Gabriel was upset.

          ** FLASHBACK**

"Why can't we just talk about this. Your not even trying to understand where I'm coming from." It was 2am and Rachelle had been tossing and turning all night thinking about this difficult decision. The room was completely dark, because she was trying to force herself to sleep, but it just wasn't working. Her and Gabriel were having a text conversation and she needed to hear his voice, so she ignored his last text and dialed his number. "You make the mistake of thinking I get some kind of joy of this. It's not easy for me either, I just know it's not what we need right now. So I'm going to make the logical decision that your emotions won't allow you to." Rai pulled out another kleenex out of the box sitting next to her pillow. "Gabriel, this is our child were talking about. This isn't some one night stand that went wrong, we made love and created a baby. How is it so easy for you to dismiss that." She paused to blow her nose."Listen, I'm done discussing this right now. You not even trying to listen to logic, I can't deal with you when your emotional like this, cause it takes over." He growled into the phone and hung up. "Hello" She said, even though she knew she had been hung up on, it was just so unbelievable. She dialed his number only to be sent to voice-mail. Frustrated she started to send him text messages, but got an error when trying to send them which let her know he had blocked her number. "Fuck! I don't wanna do this! I don't want to!" She cried into her pillow trying to keep from being to loud so she wouldn't wake her other children up. She didn't have to be to work till 7am so had time to burn and clear her mind. Taking a few deep calming breaths she sat on the side of the bed. "Pull it together Raichelle" She coached herself. Stepping into her fuzzy house shoes she made her way to the bathroom. After finishing her business and washing her hands she peeked her head in the girls rooms to check on them. They were both sound asleep cuddled in their beds with not a care in the world. She wished she could sleep as soundly as them. Raichelle stood in the doorway looking at the books, dirty clothes, craft papers, crayons and markers all over the room and shook her head. They were told nightly to straighten up their rooms before bed, she debated whether she should wake them and make them clean it themselves. Huffing she picked up the dirty clothes and threw them in the hamper. There were 3 just like she had in her room. One for whites, lights and darks. Then she picked up the books and brushed the dirt and crumbs off from the floor and put them on the shelf. Josiah loved crafts and creating things, but it frustrated Rai because she made such a mess of it and never tried to clean up after herself. She picked up the papers and cardboard and put them neatly in the drawer of her desk and put the markers, pencils and crayons in the container on top of the desk. Quietly making her way to the hall closet she grabbed the broom. The floor was wood, so she had brought a huge multicolored rug to cover most of the floor. She lifter that and threw it in the hallway, because it would need to be vacuum and it was too early to wake them. She swept the floor and closed the door. Once the rug was shaken and vacuumed she put it back and sprayed her amber and cashmere air freshener on the curtains and rug.
The kitchen was pretty much clean, except a few cups and the bowl from the ice-cream and cereal she had devoured after the kids went to sleep. After tidying up the kitchen she swept and mopped the floor and made a pot of coffee. Her nerves were shot and her mind was running a mile a minute, so she put on some gospel music to soothe her while she cleaned. The bathroom, livingroom, dinningroom and her bedroom were spotless and her mind was still running. She sat restlessly in her recliner and looked over to the clock on the wall. It read 4:45. It was still too early to wake the girls so she hopped in the shower and cooked a quick breakfast of scrambled eggs, French toast, bacon and grits. It was finally time to wake the girls. She tightened the straps on her silk robe, opened the door and turned on the light switch. Arianna rolled over and stretched before she even said anything. "Good morning sunshine" She said with a smile. "Good morning momma." Ari voice came out groggy as she sat up and rubbed her eyes. "You gotta get up, you gotta get up, you gotta get up in the morning." Raichelle began singing as she walked and reached up to the top bunk to tickle Josiahs feet. "Oh won't you get up, oh won't you get up, oh won't you get it it's the morning!" Arianna joined in and tugged lightly at her sister's arm that was hanging off the side of the bed. "Mmmm....stop it" Josiah whined and put the pillow over her head. Raichelle pulled the covers off Josiah. "Get up little girl, I made breakfast." She said walking out of the room. She already knew once she said that Josiah would pop up and rush so she could eat. "Bring your clothes to the livingroom so I can iron them." She said going down the stairs. She set up the board and poured cold water into the iron. She had turned her gospel up since the girls were now woke, so she didn't hear the alarm beep when Gabriel came in the house.  He ran his hand lightly across her lower back to get her attention. She looked up and he nodded towards thier bedroom. She still had an hour before they had to leave so she unplugged the iron and set the board against the wall so the kids wouldn't bump onto it by mistake.
"When is the appointment?" He asked as soon as she shut the door behind her. She stood the and watched him take off his jewelry and put it away before she answered. "I haven't made it yet." She mumbled. He stopped and turned to face her."Why not?" He asked, glaring intensely. She bit her bottom lip and put her head down. "Raichelle" He called her name sternly. "Look at me!" Slowly raising her head she look into his eyes with tears streaming from hers. "We don't need this right now and you know it." He sighed. His demeanor softened as he watch her silently cry. "We got things to do babe. You know this wasn't part of the plan." She nodded her head and attempted to wipe the steady flow of unwanted tears falling. She wanted to give off the impression of being angry with him, but she was so torn inside about the decision she knew she had to make all she had to show was her pain. "Come on Rai don't make this harder than it has to be." He said finally turning away to take his clothes off and put them in the dirty clothes hampers. "I'll text you with the date and time later." Her voice was raspy and came out a whisper. "Good" was the only answer she received before he went about his business.

Raichelle lay on the hard examination  table shivering in the hospital gown. She pulled the thin blanket up and gripped it tightly as she counted back from 100. Her body was shivering from the cold and tears slid down her cheeks as she stared at the ceiling and begged God to forgive her for the third time for aborting another one of her and Gabriel's babies.
She walked out into the waiting room in a daze searching for Gabriel. He stood up and rushed to her side. He grabbed her hand and pulled her I to his side as he walked her to the truck. He made sure she was seated comfortably and belted safely before pulling off. "We have to stop by the pharmacy and get my prescription." He nodded his head and turned the music up. She reached over and turned it down so he could hear her next statement. "Can we also stop at Louies so I can get a hotdogs, Chilli fries and a loganberry shake please?" He bunched his eyebrows together. "I got somewhere to be, I'm already running late. Can't you just doordash it?" She turned the music back up, let her head fall back on the headrest and turned her head to look out the window.

      **END FLASHBACK **

Zora put a plate full of Raichelle favorite sugar cookies in front of her and a bottle of French vanilla coffee creamer. "Rai, you don't have to do it all by yourself. You know I'm here whenever you or my god baby needs me." She said bringing Raichelle back to reality. "I know Zora" She huffed. "But bringing a child into this world when the father has made it clear that he doesn't want it is selfish." Zora got up and hugged Raichell.

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🥰😍😘🩷🩷 Hey guys, I hope your enjoying the read. I try to update as often as possible, but I also have to clear my thoughts first because I'm constantly hit with ideas for both of the books I'm writing. So be patient there's more to come.

Raichelle seems like she has a choice to make and from her past experiences it doesn't seem like an easy one. How will Gabriel take the news. He wasn't ready before, but will  this time around be different? Will he be accepting or against it? What do you think?

Only one way to find out.....stay tuned

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