Attacca ─ Five Hargreeves

26. The Cut That Always Bleed

The front page of the internet formulated that the name Vanya meant the gift of God, perhaps from that flyspeck of data Klaus should have realised there was more to it than met the eye. Paroxysm itself meant a violent expression of a particular emotion or activity. How did he know that? No, he didn't actually. Klaus wasn't the crackerjack in the family, but he wasn't the dead last either. The moment Nikolai Kilday dropped the word, it was completely unheard of, such a high-level term, he couldn't help but immediately look up its meaning on the search page.

That was what he found, so if he combined Vanya and paroxysm together, he could come down with a baneful answer. But it would never make sense because this was Vanya, his dear timid soft-spoken sister, one who didn't even want to step on an ant, one who constantly stood on the sidelines, observing with eyes full of zeal to join in their activities. Ben, as the best sibling out of them, had always wanted her to participate, but with the strict rules their father had set in place, both of them knew she couldn't. Because the one who would take the brunt of it was her, most of the time.

Perhaps those days were the ones that had drilled everything, sowing various sentiments would certainly have a moment where one would explode. It was quite a spectacle that Vanya could hold it in until this second, even he who had just reunited with the siblings less than a day had more entreaty to strangle than hug them. But what was it that made her so furious that she vaporised the globe? No, that wasn't it, was it? The more relevant question was since when did she have that kind of power? Wasn't she supposed to be ordinary? The most human of them all?

Yes, Reginald Hargreeves might have deceived them since they were little, it was no longer a surprise, but with Vanya who was able to wipe out the entire population, shouldn't that make him proud? He wanted heroes, a bunch who were capable of warding off evil and disaster, he had six of them, yet Vanya was perpetually the exception. Why was that? Why, if she had such abilities, was she hidden? For all Klaus knew, she could have made their assignments easier without trying so hard, those difficult tasks would have been handled without much struggles if her powers had been involved. If she alone could cripple the Earth, all those minor errands were nothing in comparison.

And then, how was Nikolai Kilday the one who knew? Sure, maybe he had more pivotal insight about them than the siblings did about each other, but Vanya who had literally never been shown to the public, how did he perceive what she had? If it was merely based on theories or conspiracies, then that was a pretty serious accusation, Klaus couldn't just believe it. Were they friends? Did she tell him? He might have stuck with that alibi if earlier Nikolai hadn't covertly inferred that Vanya had no idea about her own powers.

So, how could it end up with Vanya as the conclusion?

It was eerily confusing. Klaus had multitudinous questions, his mind was full of them. It was a tangled mess, a tribulation he did not need since he was no longer used to exercising his head to surmise a lot of things, he felt the heat steaming within. The last time he was like this was after... well, after he lost another sibling. The rest of the time he just didn't want to be aware of anything, which was why he propelled himself to get high rather than facing reality.

And right now, taking pills or drowning himself in the strongest liquor seemed like the most prominent option. He frantically scoured every nook and canny of his room, hoping for one or more pills that he had left or forgotten about. The spirits around were getting closer and clearer, it was like they were mocking him, pitying him, but no, they were mumbling garishly about their deaths over and over again. It was terribly loud, he was starting to lose his mind.