The Weight Of Life. { A TNN Fanfiction }

CHAPTER 1 - WHERE IT ALL STARTED

TW: ED, EMETOPHOBIA , SH, DRUG ABUSE
this one gets really dark so if u don't like that stuff  I advise you not to read on.
btw we are going into present time <3
The rest of the story from now will include some upsetting topics.

12:35pm: lunchtime
It was a usual lunchtime I was sat with Carly eating lunch, well I wasn't really hungry. The feeling wasn't really explainable.. I was hungry but I couldn't eat anything. It was like my body wasn't letting me. I haven't ate since Friday, it's now Monday. While Carly was focused on telling me the lastest 'gossip' I slowly pushed my food to the side, hoping she wouldn't notice. The only thing that hasn't kept me from passing out these past three days is water.

I spaced out, not hearing a word Carly was saying. My head hurt too much to do anything. "earth to Reece," Carly shouted trying to get my attention. I snapped back into reality, "sorry Carly." I said bluntly. "It's fine! Don't worry about it!" She said in her usual happy voice, "anyways I'm going to get back to work now." Carly said.

then she walked out. I was alone.

My head was pounding and I couldn't think straight, I felt sick and dizzy. I got some ibuprofen out of the drawer of my desk, these were supposed to help with headaches so I took a few. My head hurt more I felt like I was going to vomit any second. This was the worst feeling ever I just shut my eyes waiting for this pain to end. "Fuck" I muttered under my breath. this is probably the worst I've ever felt In a while. I opened my eyes and it was all blurry and distorted. Tears started streaming down my face. I had no idea what time it was. No one could see me like this. I haven't eaten In days. I feel sick. Why did I do this. I was useless, just like father told me.

A few moments later the dizziness subsided i was still in pain but I could actually move now, I slowly sat up and looked at the uneaten food beside me. Then I looked at the clock it was only 1:11pm. Time went so slow. I wanted this day to end. My mind was still spinning I couldn't even think straight, I don't know what happened but I grabbed more of the ibuprofen to 'help' with the dizziness. It didn't help at all. My heart started beating faster and I felt like I was going to pass out, but it almost seemed like my body wouldn't let me pass out. . .

A few moments later, Carly walked in she glanced over at me and said "Reece? Are you okay." She was clearly worried about me. "Yes, I'm fine Carly." I lied. Clearly I wasn't, "I don't believe you" she replied. I wish she would just stop prying at the situation. "W-what were you in here for" I stuttered, trying to change the subject. "Reece. Stop trying to change the subject," she was smart. "Carly. Just go." I demanded harshly. Carly knew I was mad so she walked out.

I was alone again, leaning back on my chair I wiped a tear from my eye. I knew what I needed to do to make myself feel better, is eat, but my body refused, the pain of starving was kind of enjoyable but severely not at the same time, it was a really random feeling I had but I knew that the end of the day was approaching. That made me terrified.

I could actually move and stand up now luckily but not too quickly. Carly then burst into my office just chatting away to me before I took her home. The car drive was just Carly talking to me about the 'gossip'. I was spaced out again I hadn't heard a word she said until we got to her house "bye Reece!" She says, the car ride home was just me, I didn't want to go home honestly. It felt less safe knowing I was COMPLETELY alone.

As soon as I got home I felt the urge to throw up. I ran to the toilet throwing up, there wasn't much to throw up.. just blood. I then looked at my arms seeing scars and blood all down them made me feel more ill.

what have I done.
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THIS WAS BRUTAL. IM SORRY
I might make happy stuff.