After the Horus Heresy. The Emperor of Mankind in his last ditch effort to keep The Imperium going he gave his successor his powers and most importantly his life so he can rebuild the damages to the Imperium. But what he didn't know that this will c...
???: I really do hope this works......is everything prepared?
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???: The reboot device has been implemented Custodian. It appears to be functioning properly unlike your feeble flesh
???: MOST EXCELLENT!!! Our Glorious Emperor's new successor will be awaken to converse with his loyal subjects once more ... .and I shall be the first to speak with him.....Hooooo i can just...take off my armor...
???: No! NO! Calm down i restrained myself for a millennia....I will not let this legendary moment to be ruined
???: Where are the toasters you promised us?
Later
In a room they were multiple skulls on display and a giant person sitting on a thrown
???: Well my divine lord, we have managed to wake you up from your coma with a device to your father's glorious Golden Throne ... .please lord.....speak to us....
Emperor: Oh my lord could you shut the fuck up. It's about time you woke me up from my damn powerup coma
Custodian: AT LAST!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Our glorious lord's new successor can finally command us!
Emperor: Calm your tits female custodie. I have so much shit to complain about< first of all. Why did you guys put a glass when my eye is okay?' Is that really necessary? Im not some rotting corpse like a fuck of a father of mine -_-. And what is with these Ultrasmurfs I keep hearing about hmmmm?
Custodian: O-oh....um.....wait are you preferring to the UltraMarines?
Emperor: Yes you fucking automaton
Custodian: But my lord....they are some of you greatest warriors!
Emperor: Well that certainly fucking explains it. It seems that the baby blue heraldry has earned them a most righteous nickname. For that matter I always thought they look terrible with their stupid ass, bulky golem looking ass fit they call "Armor". What was father thinking
Emperor: Tell me do thay still have that fucking toilet seat as their insignia?
Custodian: Well....yes they do my lord. They keep it to honor their primarch Roberta Guilliman
Emperor: Oh~ Well alright then. I always thought she was the greatest of the 20 primarchs
Custodian: Well....that's excellent, my lord
Emperor: The biggest little derivative pile of serious blueberry pudding pop fuckery that has ever glazed the surface of this shitty galaxy. Right next to Lorna that kissass
Custodian: O-oh
Emperor: Is she still alive?
Custodian: Barely. She's currently in status back on the UltraMarines home of Macragge
Emperor: Help her get out of that coma and bring her here. And tell that stupid fucking smurf village to fuck right off. Their constant uninterrupted chanting is drilling into my skull as if they are they are the immensely sanctimonious love child of Tinnus and a Jackhammer
