𝐈 𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 ! (#3)

40. Roshni

Today I wanted to find out how it feels to have a cold shower in 18°C. So weird of me.

The entire night I couldn't stop replaying all the things Vansh said and it makes me struggle to breathe normally. I hate myself after coming to a conclusion that he is right. Why was I punishing him for something someone else did? He never did anything wrong and always cared for me.

I closed my eyes and all the flashbacks came rushing to me.

I was in college when I met a guy and instantly fell in love with him. My extent of love for him was beyond imagination but he cheated on me and I was so fucking stupid to forgive him after looking at his puppy face. Over the time he kept on cheating with me until my friends took the matter in their hands. They beated the guy so much that he had to be hospitalized. I had to leave him but I wasn't able to live a life without him. I tend to forget his cheating phase and only remembered how nicely he treated me and I was just not able to accept that it was all gone.

All these years all my friends, family pretended like that thing never happened. It didn't exist but now the flashbacks are occupying my mind.

Eventually my pain grew so much that I consumed poison to kill myself and was taken to hospital. Lucky but unlucky that I was saved and sent to therapy. One year in therapy I became a normal person and started enjoying my life but I developed some serious trust issues. More than falling in love, I was scared of losing the person.

Over few months I realized my love for Vansh but I kept denying it. In the beginning I was afraid of falling for him now that I love him, I am afraid of losing him. How do I tell you what's going inside me? If one word I would use to describe my situation it was 'hell'. I want to be a normal person who trusts and love easily but I am just not able to.

Vansh was there when all of that happened and that's why he knows what I went through. He is aware of the extent of my trauma that's why he was patient and giving me time to heal.

Please this time if I give my everything in love, don't you leave me. This time I'll die where no one would be able to save me.

I wore my clothes and opened the door to find Vansh being all cozy and sleeping under a blanket. He caught a terrible cold, I never knew he was that sensitive to cold.

I headed to kitchen and made a hot soup with some breakfast. I took it to the room. I opened the door to find him sitting upstraight and rubbing his eyes innocently. His eyes sparkled when he saw breakfast in my hand. He adjusted himself and making some space for me and breakfast.

"Thanks." He said so calmly that I melted.

I could have given the breakfast and left but I didn't, I don't know why. It was like someone possessed me and making me do things I did not plan.

I sat in front of him and pushed the spoon of hot soup in his mouth. His face had question mark and surprise.

"Is it too hot?" I asked looking at the bowl of soup.

"Little bit." He said gulping the soup.

Thank god he didn't commented any cheap flirty line like 'not more than you."

I blowed air on the soup to cool it down and then offered it.

"Better." A soft smile touched his lips.

After few seconds he broke the silence.

"I was thinking we should go back today." Trying to act gentlemen all of a sudden?

"After you feel better." I wanted to go but....

"I am better." He defended.

"I can see that." I rolled my eyes.

"Caring for me Roshni Prathap?" The teasing was back.

"Why? Only you are obligated to care? Can't I? " I was full of surprises today, even to myself.

"You can." He blushed so hard that I had to try so hard not to smile and pull his cheeks.

"And you'll feel much better if you start sleeping at night instead of watching me."

"I am helpless." He shrugged his shoulders.

"What's the point of looking at me whole night, you can do that in the day." I tried to hide that I secretly liked it.

"I want to look at you as much as I can, however long possible. In case I lose you, I won't regret that I didn't see you enough." His words brought butterflies in my body.

Vansh was breaking all the boundaries which even I didn't cross in love.

I had no words to say but I was aware that Vansh is expert in reading my eyes and knows what I am feeling. I think no one knows me more than Vansh not even my family and I am not blaming them.

I have come to a point where I am scared for things that didn't happen. What if Amma had forced me to marry someone else? I would have missed out on so much love. What if Vansh had given up and married someone else? The thought of him waking up with someone else every morning made me sad more than I expected.

"Can I ask you a question?" I said before leaving.

"Hmm?"

"Did you kill him?" His eyebrows made a V. He didn't get what I meant by 'him'.

"My last ex who-" I couldn't say anything further but his flashed face indicated that he understand what I meant to say.

"I wanted to kill him back in the college days but as you know I was just a normal person with no powers. Later when I became a business man and had some authorities I did go searching for him."

"So did you find him?" I interrupted while curiousty grew bigger in my chest.

"Yes I did." He took a pause but I was being impatient. Say it fast, come on!

"I found him in a terrible state."

"Terrible state?" I questionned.

"He's living in slums after his dad lost his job and they had no income source. As you know he never paid attention to studies so he have to do labour work and was the only person earning in his family. If I had killed him, his parents would be suffering more for something he did. Plus he got his karma for all the bad things he had done, he got worse than death."

I smiled when he finished.

"So you got exceptions while killing people."

"Kind of. I am not a heartless person." He winked.

"I am sure you are not." My smile grew bigger and I left to make lunch arrangements.