Corrupt

Chapter 23

My eyes blearily flicker open. The crumbling roof of the rebels' hideout has never seemed more welcoming. Why am I moving?

"Daeva?" I mumble. It takes me a moment to realise they're carrying me, and when I do, I can't stop the pink flush from infiltrating my cheeks. 

"Clear out, you lot," their gruff voice replies, though I assume they're not talking to me. I hear the scuff of footsteps, a few grumbles. A few seconds pass, and then I'm gently placed onto my feet. In front of me, Daeva brushes off their jacket. My heart aches to stay in their arms a moment more, to keep that safe feeling a moment longer. I wish I didn't care so much.

"Lynette." 

"Hello," I say, unable to think of a better response. 

"Care to explain why I found you half-dead in the middle of the woods?" Daeva raises a sharp eyebrow. 

Oh. Yeah.

"Have you been reading my messages?" 

"Not personally," they scoff. "But yes, in a way. So you're... You're his fiancée, then?"

"Yes," I reply simply. "I-"

"If you're eavesdropping, I will know," Daeva interrupts, calling out to the alley. A pair of footsteps hastily retreats. 

"Where are we?" I ask, suddenly realising I don't recognise the small room.

"This is my chamber, if you will," they reply, sarcasm oozing from their tone. "I thought this'd be the best place for you. For now." 

"Ah. I, um, I see." 

Suffocating silence spreads through the air. I look away.

"So? The woods?"

"I... Daeva, I couldn't... I needed to find you. I... He scares me. Really scares me. I think he knows. Or suspects, at least. He knows that I know. That's why he..."

"You don't... He doesn't love you?"

The question catches me off-guard. I turn answers over in my mind, remembering the soft caress of his fingers against my face, remembering the scorch marks dotted on my skin.

"He says that he does. I think, maybe... But I think, really, he just wants to keep me under his control."

"And what do you think about that?"

"What?"

"Would you stay under his control?" They cross to the other side of the room, putting distance between us, a gap that some part of me longs to close.

"I..." 

Who can I trust?

I have to trust someone.

I don't trust him.

So I have to trust them.

"Sometimes I wish that I could pretend I didn't know all of this. I wish I hadn't met you, because I wish I could just... I wish I could just have life the way it was before. It was so... So simple, then." A silver tear trickles down my face. For once, I don't wipe it away. "But I need to help you. I need to help the truth. But Nikolas... He terrifies me. I know his power. I know what he could do to me. What he could do to you, or to my friends." 

"Am I not your friend?"

"I..." I wish they'd stop asking me these questions. Because I have no answers. "I don't know what you are." 

"Right." 

"But I... I trust you. If I trust anyone, I trust you. I needed to find you, because I was terrified. He's so close to me, all the time, and I don't... It scares me. So I ran away."

"You ran away?" Snapping up to meet mine, their gaze is indecipherable.

"I told him I was going to shop for the wedding. Then I ran away. Oh, and..." A memory jumps to the forefront of my brain. "I brought you these. Don't refuse them. They were hard to get here." I thrust my arms out, full of food and supplies, watching their shocked gaze turn to greed and curiosity. 

"I... Really?" I've never seen them so flustered. A giggle escapes my throat, despite everything.

"Yes, silly, I brought them for you all." Did I just call Daeva Korren silly? I think I did. 

"I don't... Thank you." Almost skeptically, like an edgy bird, they take the objects from me, placing them down with almost ridiculous caution. 

"Daeva?" I can't stop their name from tumbling from my lips. I must be crazy, to say what I'm about to.

"Lynette." 

I take a slow step forwards.

"I... I can't believe I'm saying this, honestly, we hardly know each other and we're total opposites and you're supposed to be my enemy, and this is crazy, but I... Every day I was in that castle, I..." What am I doing what am I doing?  "I missed you. I wanted to speak to you, and just to see you. I looked out for you. I just... I feel... Different around you. Safer. I don't... In a way, I wish I didn't. It makes it so confusing. I wish I could hate you. But I don't." 

Daeva's only response is silence, that permanent unreadable mask. 

"You're right. Yep. Yep, yep, yep, this is ridiculous, I know. I agree, actually. But I just... I just thought you should know. Daeva Korren, you make me feel safe, you make me feel like someone who... Who matters. Someone strong. I... I trust you. I wish I didn't. I don't know who's telling the truth anymore. I don't know if it's you, or if it's him. But I trust you." 

"Really?"

"Yes." I should think this through. I really should think this through.

"Okay. You trust me. You want to lead a revolution? You want to find the truth?"

"Yes."

"Stay with us, then."

"What?" I stammer.

"Stay here, with the rebels. You can have this food, these clothes. You can keep that pretty dress. You can help me work out our strategies, practice your fighting, so we can win. You can stay here, with me." 

"I... You want me to stay?"

"Not what I said."

"You... Need me to stay?"

"Not what I meant."

"So what, exactly, are you suggesting?" I take another step towards them, closer, so I can see the smattering of gold shards in their eyes.

"Fine!" 

They back away, ever so slightly. I don't push my luck. 

"Lynette, I want..." The rebel leader takes a deep breath. "I want you to stay with me."