Corrupt

Chapter 13

I sit quietly for a few minutes, feeling the gentle earth beneath me, wrapped in the calm silence. Horrific images still flash through my mind, but my breathing slowly returns to normal.

If I stay here a little longer, perhaps I can stay within this mind-forged refuge. Forget it all.

Whilst I hate to admit it, if I could choose to forget this cruel world I've uncovered, rather than working with Daeva to change it, I would in a heartbeat.

I want it to change. I don't want these people to live like this.

But I'm not a trailblazer. I'm not a leader. I'm not powerful like Daeva, or strong and quick like Nyx. I can't start a revolution. I can't fight. I hardly know who I'm fighting against.

I'm just a castle maid. I'm good at baking, sewing, cleaning.

I help people. But not to fight in wars.

Under my breath, I sing a soft tune, letting my hushed voice reverberate gently back to me. It's a melody we used to sing at the castle as we worked. A sort of comfort song, for whenever any of us were feeling down. The lyrics wrap around me like a warm embrace.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine... You make me happy, when skies are grey..."

It's a love song. I've never heard the darker edge before, never realised the depth. Through the wood planks above, the skies are certainly grey. Light rain begins to fall through the cracks.

"You'll never know, dear, how much I love you... Please don't take my sunshine... Away..."

The words tremor as a sob shakes my shoulders.

I just want to go home.

Raising my head, I close my eyes, and let the building tears flee my eyes, mix with the cool rainwater. Nature weeps as I do: weeps for these people, starving in the streets, suffocated by the oblivious society; weeps for those oblivious people whom I have left behind, the friends I miss so dearly; weeps and cries and sobs.

I've never felt so lost.

Scuffed, firm steps.

"Oh, there you are, princess. Damn, what did you do to your hair?"

A familiar voice.

"What's wrong?"

I find no response. Words cannot put these feelings to justice.

"Is it the new hairdo? I like it, darling. And I bet it's... Lighter."

Daeva crouches beside me.

"Was that you singing? Just now?"

I nod.

"It sounded pretty. What were you singing?"

"It's just... Something we used to sing. Back at the castle. Me and my friends."

"Sing it."

"What?"

"Sing it again. I want to hear." Daeva looks at me expectantly.

I swallow my choking tears and sing.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine... You make me happy..." I trail off, unable to finish.

"When skies are grey..." Daeva completes. Their singing is terrible. But... So was Drea's. I bury my face in my hands. They've seen me cry too many times already. "Hey. Hey. What's wrong?"

"It's horrible here," I say. "I hate it."

"I'm sorry I snapped at you."

"It's okay. I get it. I just... I just want to go home."