I need something lighthearted now.
Dashi: Here's a riddle. Shellington, Kwazii and Tunip are standing in a room. One can't spell their name-
Tunip (interrupting): That's me!
Dashi: Oh wait never mind. Two of them can't spell their name.
***
Dashi: If life gives you lemons...
Kwazii: I don't like lemons.
Dashi: No, it's an expression-
Kwazii: I'd give the lemons to Tweak.
Tweak: I don't like lemons either!
***
Shellington: Kwazii stop stealing.
Kwazii: Not stealing, commandeering.
Shellington: You got that from Pirates of the Caribbean.
Kwazii: Well I am just commandeering it!
Shellington: You can't commandeer an orange Kwazii!
Kwazii: Just watch me
***
Tunip: I tried some of Uncle Inkling's tea today.
Shellington: That's nice.
Tunip: It tasted bad.
Shellington: That's nice.
Tunip: Uncle Inkling says it's special tea that makes him happy.
Shellington: That's nice.
Tunip: Uncle Inkling says he can see Sarah when he drinks it.
Shellington: That's-
Shellington (later): Inkling, what the hell are you putting in that stuff
***
Kwazii: Dashi you're stupid
Dashi: Heyyy!
Kwazii: But now I shall take the offence for you. I am very offended.
Dashi: ?
Kwazii: Since you now owe me offence, I shall take the liberty of offending you again. You're stupid.
Dashi: ???
Kwazii: I'll be here all night.
***
Captain Barnacles: I've heard you've taken to staying up late in the library and listening to the Professor's stories, Kwazii. That's really good of you-
Kwazii: I'm quitting my sleeping tablets.
***
Kwazii: I have the best memory ever
Dashi: And the time you forgot your pirate pie recipe?
Kwazii: I have no recollection of that event ever occurring.
***
Kwazii: I'm bored, give me something to do.
Shellington: Figure out your life.
***
Kwazii: I'm bored, give me something to do.
Captain Barnacles: Stop procrastinating on your chores Kwazii.
Kwazii: How did you know?
***
Kwazii: I'm bored, give me something to do.
Inkling: Figure out why we're here on Earth.
Kwazii: To provide me with some light amusement throughout my daily labours.
Inkling: I will never understand you.
***
Captain Barnacles: Is that the vacuum cleaner I can hear? Good, Kwazii's finally doing his chores.
Tweak: Cap, that's his falsetto.
YOU ARE READING
Octonauts Oneshots
FanfictionThis is my first book, and it started when I gave Shellington anaphylaxis (extreme allergies). From there, I put the Octonauts through murder mystery parties, role reversals and a whole lot more. I'm a supporter of Dashton and Twazii, and I think Sh...
