Desiderius Love

Chapter 8

I should have stayed with Nova.

I wish I was in Switzerland with her as I can imagine us exploring the little towns, enjoying the food, having fun riding the railways and just be free where no one was hunting me. I could just imagine Nova's face experiencing things for the first time, that bright smile with her big eyes whenever she gets excited. Forget about myself enjoying the explorations of a new country, I get more excited when she is excited and I know I did something right. 

I can wish all I want but I know it won't come true anymore but I hope Nova is having the best time of her life, I tried to give her the best couple of months she deserved.

The plane ride with my brother's back was filled with uneasiness. I was scared to face my father and potentially my soon-to-be husband and I didn't know what to expect with them two but I do know it will result in me getting hurt. My brothers have spoken a few words but besides that they have icing me out which as much as I usually hate, today it adds to the uneasiness. Closer and closer we got, the pit in my stomach got worse and I had to mentally prepare what is coming for me, I had to prepare for the torment and the pain that will follow. If my father could break my hand over sneaking out to sell my artwork, who knows what he is going to do for running away.

Once the plane landed, I was pushed out of my seat and into the car waiting for us. Due to tendencies of running, I was put in the middle seat of the car, both my brothers squishing me which heightened the feelings running through me. 

"Will Nicolas be at the house?" I asked, breaking the silence in the car

"No, it's just father and us" Francesco smirked which only added to my anxiety. The entire car ride home I felt like I was suffocating, at one point I thought I was going to pass out because of the lack of oxygen but unfortunately that didn't happen. 

As the car approached the gate, all the calming techniques I had flew out the window and I was fully having a panic attack in the car with my brother but obviously they didn't care. Once we pulled up to the front, I could see my father's face. He has aged since the last time, more gray hairs have appeared and he looks skinnier but not healthy. 

My brothers forced me out of the car and my legs gave out but if it weren't for my brothers holding me up I would have collapsed. 

I kept telling myself to pull it together to show I wasn't scared but I couldn't. I am terrified of my father more than anything and he knew that. I kept my head down, trying not to look him in the eye but I felt the grip of his hand on my chin, pulling my face up 

"Look at me" He demanded as I looked at him and trying to put on a brave face "You better start praying to God right now for mercy because you will not get that here" He harshly let go of my face and walk inside. "Take her downstairs" He ordered and I am forcibly moved inside. I couldn't feel my legs, they felt like jelly and I had no control.

Downstairs is where my father does his "business". It's where he torments and hurts people to get information out and I was going to be one of them who doesn't come back alive. 

I was pushed into a room, the doors locking behind me and the lights off. He's using his tactics that he has previously used but this time I didn't have anyone saving me.

Time has passed but I don't know how long but I am assuming maybe 2 days as I was given bread and water twice. Living with my father, I have learned to ration my food and water so it has become an instinct at this point and he wouldn't be able to break me. He doesn't understand I have nothing to live for anymore as he took art away and my freedom away when he sold me off to Nicolas. 

I hear the door opening and the lights from the outside blinding me. My father and brothers walk in, turning on another light so its inside this time.