♡•you found me • melanie martinez• ♡

♡☆i need you☆♡

(MAJOR TW)

Madis pov:
Its been like 2 weeks of living with mel and not gonna lie things are hard not because of melanie i love her shes the only reason im out of my abusive house hold but things are hard and im in my mind alot. My mom and dad keep threatening to sue mel and call the cops for kidnapping so we have been trying to deal with them and its so stressful melanie took my blades so i cant cut i feel like i have no copin mechanism i talk to mel about it but i dont want to stress her out since she probably is already stressed out with just takin in me and my parents shes probably havin a hard time and i dont want to add to that with my over reactions and emotions i feel so hopeless and useless all i do in this world is take up space i havent done anything usefull and i know im only 14 but im never gonna do anything useful if it wasnt for mel i probably would have ended up dead somewhere but i cant keep doing thing i need to let go even if its selfish of me i will be doin everyone a favor the only person who truly loves me is melanie and she will get over it and when she is over it she will realize that shes glad im gone and life was better before she found me on that curb i plan my last day out making sure its at least a good one i put my phone on mute so i dont have to think about my parents i watch alot of movies with mel and just relax knowing that today will be the last day its a nice yet nerve racking feeling but i push those away its night now i look out my window admiring the street nights of new york and the wonderful tall buildings this world is such a nice place without anyone maybe if i turn into a ghost i can truly relax i can live in this big city without hurting or bothering anyone without the stress of my parents or my weight or how i look and thats the true dream. I wait until I'm sure melanie is asleep, which is about 2am then i slowly and quietly exit my room, heading to the kitchen, grabbing the sharpest knife i can find. i walk back to my room trying to to make one sound i shut my door and head into my bathroom i wrote a note for mel earlier when i was looking out my window at the lights that sparkled in the night i left the note on my bed. I got in the bathtub sitting in a comforting way my hands shaked as i held the knife up to my wrist positioning it to where my vein was i had my doubts i did love mel and doing this to her would have been the hardest thing ive ever done but i knew in the long run in a year or two she would be happier without me.. so i did it i pressed hard and moved the blade of the knife quickly my wrist felt intense pain as blood was pooling out leaving a big puddle on my clothes and in the bath i painfully switched the knife to my injured hand as i silently sobbed i did the same i pressed hard with the blade and quickly dragged i did so and much more blood came out. Out of reflects i let out a loud whine and dropped the knife i put my hand to my mouth as i let out sobs the lights in my bathroom got dimmer and i started seeing black dots my head was dizzy in my last moments i really wondered if this was a good idea then i blacked out.

I woke up in what seemed to be a hospital. My head was throbbing. i looked to the side, and me and mel locked eyes she immediately jumped up and hugged me. "Why.. Why baby, i thought you were getting better.." she sobbed into me,"i-.." i tried speaking, but i had nothing to say "why wouldnt you talk to me? " Now that one i can answer "i didnt want you to be anymore stressed i asummed u where stressed out cus of the fact you just brought me into ur life i child that needs so much and just dont want to put all that on you" i can help it anymore i break down "baby i will be fine trust me i can handle it... dont try leaving me again