Sunkissed Serendipity

Chapter 71

Julian

I'm staring right at her.

I didn't want to come to this party. I wasn't going to come to this party, but she had asked me to. She begged me to come, and so I thought I'd do something for her one last time. This would be my last time being around her, and then I'm promising to stay away from her.

I should hear her out.

But what exactly was there to even listen to? Listen to her tell me that she loved me but also that she couldn't—for whatever reason—tell her family or at least friends about me. It didn't make sense. If she loved me, I would have been important enough for her to tell people about me.


I'm holding the can of soda hard in my hand, the metal cold against my palm. I'm looking over at her, at the way she was standing with her feet. She had opened her mouth a few times to say something, and a bit conversation moved past her. She was trying, though, and as she fails to gather attention from her friends, I wonder who she is around them. Was she seriously the girl who had to try in order to get herself heard?

Even though a part of me disliked her right now, I couldn't help but feel bad for her. Why weren't her friends interested in what she had to say? Were they seriously ignoring her? But as I continue to stare at her, I find that it was just because they were talking about something else. Something they were passionate about.

At last, she walks away from them. When she moves her shoulder to the right, her eyes catch mine. I should feel awkward about the fact that I have been caugbt staring at her, but I don't. Instead, I watch her eyes soften, and the look alone makes my insides grow warm. I used to love this look from her—the easy way her eyes find mine in a crowd. But I feel the same emotion in another sense today. Today I feel frustrated at the actions as well, because I couldn't believe that she was looking at me that way when she had messed up things between us.

Her look is willing me to understand something, even though I do not know what it is. Her lips pull up in a smile, and then she turns away. I lean against the wall I'm standing next to. She had thrown the party outside, so we were in her backyard. It was decorated as a party should look, and there were plenty of seats for everyone. I had walked through her side alley like everyone else. As I look at her, I wonder what she is doing.

She stands in the center of the space now, and a few seconds later, I hear the loud screech of a microphone feedback. It makes me wince, and a few people cover their eyes. "Sorry," she says, placing the microphone close to her mouth. She is laughing slightly, which is a little awkward. "As you all know, I'm the one person who can always be counted on to start off karaoke."

"Yes!" someone I'm familiar with yells out. I don't glance at him because if I do, I'll feel jealous all over again. He knows her, and everyone knows the history they have. And while I'm the guy she is apparently in love with, no one knows about me. It's embarrassing, not to mention humiliating.

"Yeah," she says with a laugh again. Then she clears her throat and says, "But before I get to that, I wanted to say a few things."

Everyone is murmuring, but I cannot seem to tear my eyes off her. She is red in the face, seemingly nervous. "So, this summer has been different for me," she starts, and my ears strain to hear her over all the talk beside me. I fight the urge to punch someone who is talking in the face and instead stuff my hand in my pocket. "Yes, and it's all because of a person," she continues. Her eyes catch mine even though I'm in the back. "I'd like everyone to meet my boy—"

The word never fully comes out of her mouth when I turn fast on my heels. Moving out of the crowd, I make a beeline for out of the backyard. I'm standing at the side of her house when hot, growing frustration moves through me. I crush the soda in my hand and hear the can fal with a loud crash on the floor. I walk all the way out of her house and toward my car.