I woke up and Steph offered me breakfast. I had to eat something to not raise suspicion. I got a bowl of cereal for myself and took slow, careful bites. I had just burned off all those calories, I couldn't let myself replenish all of that. How would I be able to get my dream body while letting myself eat like a death row prisoner? Whenever Steph wasn't looking, I dumped spoonfuls of Cheerios into my napkin until most of the bowls contents were sitting in a soggy mush in the napkin. When it looked like I ate a reasonable amount, I discreetly threw out the napkin and covered it with a little trash to hide it. I then went off to school.
Once I got to school, I went straight to the office to explain my situation. I entered the secretary's room and she warmly greeted me. "Hello, y/n! What can I do for you?" "So I kind of have this stalker that keeps putting AirTags in my backpack so can I have a pass to take my bag to class?" "A stalker? Should you get the police involved?" She raised her eyebrows with concern. "No, it's not that serious. It's not even that unusual considering my parent's status." "Okay, but yes I will make sure to send out an email to your teachers." "Thank you!" I left the office pleased and went to Spanish class.
-after school-
I just got off of the bus and was heading home. It was 5 pm and the sun was getting deeper in the sky. The days were getting longer, at this time last month, the sun would be dipping into the horizon. Luckily, the stalker couldn't have put another AirTag in my backpack since my bag was with me all day. I got home and started to do sit-ups in my room. Fifteen minutes into my workout, the doorbell rang. I wiped away my sweat and went downstairs to answer it. I expected it to be Birdseed, Nora, or another one of my friends but it was some kid that I had never seen before. I tried to figure out who this kid was and why he was here. His face seemed so familiar but I just couldn't put my finger on it. "Y/N Patrick, I'm such a big fan of the theorist channels! I would love nothing more than an autograph!" He anxiously swooned. I chuckled nervously and closed the door behind me. "How the hell did you find out where I live?" I interrogated. The gears started to turn in my brain. I realized where I have seen his face. He was the kid that was at my locker.
"Well!?" "Oh um...Zach told me?" That was a pretty solid lie considering he made it up on the spot, however there was a crucial flaw in his story. "Liar! Zach doesn't know where I live!" "Fine...I put AirTags in your backpack." He quickly whispered. "It was YOU? YOU STALKED ME?" I yelled. "All I wanted was to get to know you. You seem really cool y/n." "I don't care what your reason was! You stalked me! What kind of jerk DOES that? And you have some audacity if you think you could still get an autograph." "Please! I will do anything! I will do your homework for a month! I'll pay you!" He pathetically fished a ten dollar bill out of his pocket. He desperately tried to hand it to me with his quivering hands. I stared at it in awe. "I don't want your money!" I pushed his hand away. "What do you think this is? A bribery? A negotiation? Get off of my porch! Go away!" "Do you know my sister?" He randomly asked. That was a weird question but I answered it anyway. "Who the hell is your sister?" "Tessa!" "Tessa...Shanning? That weird girl who brings a lighter to school?" "She's a mega fan too! Could I at least get an autograph for her?" "No! Get. Off. My. Property. If I have to repeat myself again, so help me I will call the cops." I went back inside and slammed the door. I watched through the window as he stormed off the porch and walked back up the street. I didn't leave the window until I saw him turn the corner.
I went back to my room to finish working out and then I went downstairs for dinner. All I had eaten for the whole day was a few spoonfuls of cheerios. My stomach cried for food. My brain wouldn't budge though. It seemed like everyone was watching me so I ate the first bite. After that bite, everything weakened. My mouth demanded more. My stomach seemed to make more room. Even the image of a skinnier me seemed to fade. At the very minimum, I couldn't let myself have the whole plate. I allowed myself to eat half of the meal. I put my plate in the sink feeling like a disgusting failure. I wanted to throw up but I didn't want to go there yet. The day where I started to force myself to throw up would be the point of no return. The drop on the roller coaster. I wasn't ready for that yet. Instead, I went into the bathroom and grabbed the razor.
I made one deep cut into my hip. I kept the blade dug into my skin for a good few seconds before taking it out. The whole time the blade was in my skin I muttered chants to myself. "Stupid, worthless, fat, ugly." I watched as the red drizzled down my leg with a disturbing, cold grin on my face. My sins were leaking out with my blood. I was draining myself free of my disgraceful behavior at dinner. I carelessly wiped the blood away, put the razor back, and went back to my room like nothing had happened. I felt cleansed. I felt rejoiced. Now that the sins were gone, I could focus myself back into exercising my fat off. I could focus myself into restraining all food intake. A slim, pretty figure awaited in the distance. It was almost in my palm, just a few inches out of reach. However, to get there I would have to work. I closed my door and did more sit-ups until my stomach felt like it was punched by a professional boxer.
YOU ARE READING
Trauma-ridden and adopted by matpat
FanfictionThis is a sequel to my first story, abused and cancerous to adopted by matpat. I would highly recommend that you read it before you read this one, enjoy!