All I am (Completed)

M

All he is.

Him in all his glory.
We're supposed to love, hate and feel destroyed. It's what makes us human, It's what declares us alive.

If there's a crisis you don't stop. You move forward.

What makes us whole? What kills us is supposed to make us stronger with help. Who determines that we are whole? What makes us complete? Could it be that love is what satisfies the heart and destroys the soul?

"If you need a place to fall apart, I will be that place." That's what he said.

Just when we were getting close, he wanted to be my sanctuary. He wanted to be my safeplace.

But he couldn't be... He just couldn't. And its not like I didn't trust him, its just that I couldn't pull myself to.

He was my safeplace... My sanctuary. The place were I could go and feel secure... Safe. He betrayed me and expected me to run into his arms at his beckoning, sorry its just not going to happen... Not this time.

I would have given him my heart if he needed it, no questions asked. And the sad truth is: I let myself believed that I could change his heart from her and towards me. But that didn't work instead it drove him to her more and more. Atleast, that's what I let myself believe.

I can't keep falling to pieces whenever he called. I can't feel the need to have him to myself when he only wants Juliara. Compared to her, who am I? I want him to be happy. Even if that meant being with someone else. But, that made me think. Why did I kill him?

It was all for love. It's something that humans would die for. It's the thing that makes us who we are and its the thing that condemns us to eternal hell. Who really goes to heaven these days?

"Helania." He looked off at Hades speaking to the demons, then he looked at me with a cunning smile.."I didn't think you'd come."

"Why not?"

"Come on, you're a freaking queen."

"It shouldn't matter."

"Well it does. How do I look being the guy that used to screw the queen when she was in human form?"

"Used to be?"

"Let's not argue, ok? That's not what I called you here for."

"So tell me what it is then, Bruce." I was getting heated because of his silly games. I had a lot of pressure on me and I just got back here.

"Just know that time and space continuum still applies. What is a day on earth is a thousand here."

"So, it haven't even been a week since I died?"

"No, just three days. I have no idea what is going on up there but you should have the power to."

"Maybe I do. I can use a new body or just go in this form, its not like they could see me anyways."

"Right. And the other thing is..." He came closer to me and I let my lips open to him. He hungrily bit my bottom lip as he kissed me.

"M," my eyes welled with tears. How dare I cry right now? It's been a while without him and I needed him to keep a promise.

"Yes Hel?"

"You said that if I needed a safe-"

"-place then come to me."

"Right. I need a safe place." And I finally broke down because of all the pressure. My safe place.