The Love That Isn't Mine

V. Sweet Tooth

Tahimik lang ito sa duration ng byahe pabalik. It took us thirty five minutes to go back. Hindi ako nagsalita kahit halos paliparin na nito ang sasakyan sa Highway.

Hindi agad kami nagtuloy sa bahay. San Isidro was one big province. And the population had risen since establishments started to build and grow here.

Pero napapaligiran pa din ito ng mga bundok at kapatagan.

Napakunot noo ako ng tumigil ito. Alam ko ang lugar na ito but I had never been here. Nung teenager ako, naririnig ko na puntahan ito ng mga teenager na pumupuslit para mag-date. May grotto dito at may mga maliliit na establishment na ng kapihan, mga panciteria, bike shop para sa mga gustong mag-bike sa umaga and small businesses.

And I realize why this was a bit famous. The view was breathtaking. Makikita ang city lights ng San Isidro at ang mga barangay nito.

"Ang ganda." Wala sa loob na bulong ko.

Nakatitig lang ito sa malayo.

May mga ibang sasakyan na nakaparada din at parang nag-eenjoy lang sa katahimikan at view.

There were a few people. Alas siete lang ng gabi. At nakita kong nakalagay doon na hanggang alas dose lang nila binubuksan ang mga ilaw dito.

I looked at Marcus's face.

Kung anong sigla nito kanina ay siyang tahimik nito ngayon.

He turned the radio on and a soft music played in the air. We were both looking outside the view. And I was waiting for him to say anything.

"We went here a lot when we were teenagers."

Napalingon ako dito. "Hmm?"

"This was our place."

Nakatitig lang ako sa side profile nito. The moon and the light from the lamp post were illuminating his face. And he seemed so sad...

"Is it bad?"

Natigilan ito at lumingon sa akin. He shrugged and changed his facial expression. "She knew the engagement."

Bumuka yung bibig ko. "Wait. Anong explanation mo?"

"What do you want me to say? Nakita ka niya. Nakita niya tayong magkasama."

"Hindi ka nag-explain? Hindi mo sinabi ang plano natin?"

"Would she believe me?"

"At least sana tinry mo!"

Tumigil ito at napatitig sa akin. "How could I? She is right. She is still married and I'm stuck— stuck—" Napalunok ito.

"You're stuck with me." Pagbubuo ko sa sentence nito.

"I'm sorry." Bulong nito. "I—" Frustrated na lumingon ito sa labas. "We both wanted to get out of San Isidro. Of our own families a long time ago. I did. Pero hindi siya nakasama."

"And you came back for her?"

"It's too late."

Ah, oo nga pala. Dahil kinasal ito kay Leon.

"You can both start again. Pero dapat pareho kayo ng starting line this time, Marcus." Mahina kong sabi.

Napalingon siya sa akin. His fist clenched against the stirring wheel.

"Alam kong hindi mo pa ako pinagkakatiwalaan sa mga plano mo. But partnership without trust will collapse. Hindi ko alam kung pano natin magagawa ito without having each other's backs."

Hindi pa din ito nagsalita.

I could remember what I saw earlier.

Alice got out of the ice cream shop stoic, stiff and her eyes were devoid of any emotions. And Marcus was angry and... hurt.