Wish We Never Started

35

SIX MONTHS LATER

"So you're going to distract her by talking about Dungeons and Dragons, right? Her back to me. Then, I'll set up in front of the water fountains and you'll ask her if she wants to see the display happening in a few minutes. Then she will see me, and BAM, It happens."

Diego throws back the rest of his beer, looking pretty satisfied with his plan.

"I told you. I know exactly nothing about Dungeons and Dragons," I remind him.

"Yeah, and I gave you a handbook so you can learn."

"Diego, Astrid knows that I don't know anything about it," I say, raising my eyebrows as I try to get the message across to him. "It's going to throw her off big time."

"Okay, then just talk about something she likes. Anything to distract her for a few seconds so I can just get the ring out and get down on one knee, alright?" Diego pleads with his eyes, both hands together at his chest.

"I promise," I say, putting both of my hands onto his shoulders. "You'll end up engaged at the end of it."

"I love her," he says, diverting his eyes to the floor.

"I know. That's why you're proposing," I remind him, sincerely hoping he's not getting cold feet. We've rehearsed this for weeks now.

"It's scary. I know she loves me too, and we both want this. But it's still scary," he mumbles, dragging a hand through his hair.

"It's supposed to be," I say, moving my hands back to my sides.

"Do you ever think about proposing to Sadie?" He asks, moving his eyes to meet mine again. There is hesitation written all over his face.

"Every day. But for us, we're not there yet. I don't think so at least."

Diego sighs and leans his lower back against the kitchen counter. "Six months isn't that long but it just feels so fucking right, you know? I feel it in my bones."

"I know," I say, thinking the same way about my relationship with Sadie. It's funny how both of us found our soulmates at the same time. But before we found them, we found each other.

There's a sudden knot in my stomach. Something that has been coming and going for months. The fact that I've never told Diego about my marriage to Sarah. He deserves to know, but I'm afraid of how he's going to take it.

Now that Sarah and me are officially divorced, a giant weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I've heard from my mom that she moved to Vermont, my mom's tone extremely displeased as she told me. My mom and I have never fully recovered from the airport incident and now speak less than ever. But really, I don't mind.

"Can I tell you something?" I ask, positioning myself to face him, my hip resting against the counter.

He looks startled, his eyes widening as he nods quickly. "Are you in love with me? Because I-"

"Diego," I mutter, my eyes closing as I try not to laugh. "No."

His shoulders relax, but his expression is still concerned.