O'CONNELL'S LOVER

Twenty one

As the movie played, we munched on some snacks, laughing and commenting on the funny moments. I felt completely relaxed and content, nestled against Billie's side with her arm wrapped around me.

As we cuddled on the couch, watching the movie and enjoying the snacks, a nagging feeling of uncertainty began to creep into my mind.

I couldn't shake the feeling that things were moving a bit too fast between us. We had only been dating for a few months, and already we had talked about moving in together, shared our bodies with each other, and even discussed our future together.

I tried to ignore the voice in my head, telling myself that everything was fine. We loved each other, right?

But even as I told myself that, the doubts continued to gnaw at me. Was it really healthy to be so wrapped up in each other so quickly? Couldn't things become suffocating, if we didn't take some time to slow down and breathe?

The next morning, I woke up early, careful not to wake Billie as I got out of bed. I padded to the kitchen, still trying to ignore the feelings of uneasiness from the night before.

As I made myself some tea, I wrote a note, my heart heavy with the decision I knew I had to make. I set it down on the couch, knowing that Billie would find it when she woke up.

The words on the note were brief and to the point. "I need some time to think," I had written. "Don't worry, I'll call you soon."

I had considered explaining more, but I wasn't ready to have that conversation yet. I needed space to sort through my thoughts and feelings, away from the distraction of Billie's presence.

Billie pov

The morning sun filtered through the curtains, casting a warm glow over the apartment. Billie stretched and rolled over, expecting to feel Lima's warm body beside her.

But the bed was empty, the sheets cool beneath her hand. She felt a pang of disappointment, wondering where her girlfriend had gone.

Getting up slowly, Billie made her way to the kitchen, still half-asleep. Maybe Lima was just in the kitchen, making coffee.

But as soon as she walked into the living room, her heart sank. There on the couch, illuminated by the soft morning light, was a folded piece of paper. It was the only thing that stood out on the otherwise empty couch.

She could already guess what it was. She approached it slowly, her stomach twisting into knots. As she unfolded the paper, her suspicions were confirmed - it was a note from Lima.

"hello my baby. I need time to think about our relationship. I know we are childhood friends and we did everything together but during our high school years we haven't talked or got to know each other during the phases. I love you but I'm scared we are going to fast.

Love you, eiumi."

Billie felt a mix of emotions wash over her as she read Lima's words. She could understand her girlfriend's concerns - they had known each other for a long time, but as more than platonic friends, only recently.

But she also felt a pang of hurt and disappointment. She had thought things were going well, that they were both happy and enjoying themselves. And now Lima wanted to take a step back?

She sat down on the couch, her mind racing with questions and doubts. Had she rushed things too much? Should she have given Lima more space and time?

Billie felt a sense of loneliness wash over her, realizing that she might be spent the next few days without her girlfriend's company.

She looked down at the note again, reading over the words over and over, as if trying to find some hidden meaning in them. But all she saw was the stark, impersonal message, and the fact that Lima had chosen to leave this way, without even talking to her face-to-face, stung more than she wanted to admit.

As Billie read the address scribbled down on the note, a flicker of curiosity mingled with the hurt and confusion. She wondered what this address meant to Lima, and if visiting it could offer any insight into her girlfriend's state of mind.

Despite her desire to understand what was going through Lima's mind, Billie knew that she shouldn't go to the address unannounced. Taking a deep breath, she folded the note and tucked it into her pocket, resolving to give Lima the space she had asked for for now.

The apartment felt especially quiet and empty without Lima's presence, and Billie knew it was going to be a long day. She tried to distract herself with chores and tasks, but every once in a while, her mind would go back to the note and the uncertainty it had planted in her heart.