Lies [Dazai x Akutagawa]

7

After the incident that day, dazai started assigning akutagawa missions far more ridiculous and extremely dangerous.

After every mission akutagawa could no longer feel his body. Everyday he stepped inside his room with a ugly scar and a bloody body. Exhaustion drowned him to the point he could no longer feel the pain.

________

"Pathetic" dazai's voice ringed in akutagawa's ears.

Akutagawa's body was covered in wounds and painted with blood. He felt like his head was drowned in water. All those missions had already taken a huge take on akutagawa that he was barely managing to keep himself intact day by day. And now this training with dazai had left him nothing better than a corpse. His body no longer felt his. His weak constitution and his poor lungs was unable to keep up with the impact.

"Such a weak and useless thing you are. Can you be something other than disappointment. Don't make me regret bringing you in than I already do akutagawa." Dazai said leaving the place, leaving the boy alone on the cold basement.

________

Akutagawa couldn't feel himself. He was mentally and physically broken. He felt helpless. No matter how much he tried, he couldn't understand what will make him worthy of dazai. He had no idea what he should do to be acknowledged by his saviour. No matter what he does, he manages to disappoint dazai everytime. He always believed that one day he will prove to be worthy of dazai. But now, the feeling of hopeless has slowly started to consume him. The dark abyss has drowned his entire self. No matter what he tried, dazai always got mad at him. Akutagawa felt like there was no end to this abyss. He felt like a soul lost in the dark. He felt like he had lost himself.

____________

That day, akutagawa was assigned to a mission which was so far the most dangerous and most difficult one that the demon had cursed on him till now. The mission was no way a one man task, but dazai didn't seem to think much about it. He had decided to send akutagawa all alone with, no backup, no proper information, to deal with the shit he had no idea about.

Still, akutagawa had managed to beautifully deal with the situation. He managed to capture all of the men except one man. The man was the assistant of the boss of the organization. He had somehow managed to escape the area, leaving the boss behind. Yet, anyone else who was not akutagawa would have definitely died in that situation.

_________

"What a failure" dazai threw the bunch of papers on akutagawa " You can't even do such a simple mission properly. how much more useless can you prove to be. Weak and pathetic. "

Those words that came out of dazai's mouth made akutagawa feel something. Something he had never felt before. He was too tired and exhausted and His head was not in the right state of mind think properly.

" shut up"

The room suddenly went quiet after the silent voice.

Akutagawa panicked, realising what had just slipped out of his mouth.

"What did you say" dazai's voice turned darker.

Fear ran down akutagawa's spine. However, there was something else. If it was any other day, akutagawa would have immediately fell on his knees and would have begged dazai for his forgiveness for an action like this. But today, something was different. There was something else. There was new feeling inside him that pushed him forward.

" I know it's my fault for letting the guy escape. But dazai san you know that the mission you assigned me was definitely not a one that's done alone and calling me weak after I had managed to capture the boss and the rest of the members except that man, it's unfair." Akutagawa said it all in one breath.

Silence loomed over the cold basement.

"Unfair you say. Dare to question my decision now I see" a dark voice broke the strange silence.

"It's not...." akutagawa panicked.

"Then care to educate me what's right and what's wrong" dazai said as he dangerously came closer to akutagawa. He grabbed akutagawa's neck, looking straight into the trembling boy's eyes."Have you forgotten your place now akutagawa kun".

"Im sorry Dazai san" Akutagawa croaked out with tears in his eyes, as his lungs became more and more desperate for air.

"Behave like this one more time, there won't be tongue to say what's fair and what's not. Decide wisely now" dazai threatened as he threw akutagawa on the floor and left the place.

"Yes dazai san " akutagawa accepted his fate.

Akutagawa will never know how to be recognised by his god and gain his approval.

________

(Next day)

Akutagawa was walking down the corridor of port mafia, not caring about his surroundings. He was annoyed, not about anything in particular, but just annoyed. These past few days with dazai has been really stressful and frustrating. He was too annoyed to care about anything at all.

He was walking too fast and absent minded to even notice an object lying on the he middle of the track and tripped over it.

When he stood up he saw Q lying on the floor and he knew he was doomed.

He opened his front camera with his trembling hands , only to see the mark of the scissors plastered in the centre of his face.

He knew he was damned. He had a meeting with dazai in 10 minutes.

I need to find a solution quickly

Akutagawa was storming his brain for solutions when he finally found the one and only solution - dazai.

He is doomed for sure.

________

Standing before dazai, akutagawa was dying of embarrassment.

Dazai was staring at his face as if he was looking at a new specimen without a drop of word spilling out of his mouth.

Say something!! Akutagawa was internally screaming.

Suddenly an evil smirk was plastered on the man's face.

"You are making a very amusing face akutagawa- kun. Do you need something from me?" He said comming closer to akutagawa.

Akutagawa went completely red. He never thought he would owe dazai more than what he already owe him. He bit his lips in embarrassment.

Ah... Kill me.

"Can you please remove this mark on my face dazai san" akutagawa said biting his lips.

"What did you say? I can't hear you" dazai said grinning from one end to another mockingly.

Let me kill this man before I kill myself.

"Can you remove this please dazai san" akutagawa repeated once again, louder than before.

"Why should I ?" The man in front of him said simply.

Why should I??... Why should he?.. Of course!.Does this man expect him to go around with scissors on his face?!!

"Tell me why should I akutagawa kun?" He said as he raised his hand.

Akutagawa closed his eyes and prepared himself for the surreal pain to come. But what came felt even more surreal than expected. The pain he expected reduced to a gentle pat on the cheek. Akutagawa froze in place.

He felt like the word gentle did not belong to dazai.

"Don't embarrass me with a ridiculous face like this again." Dazai said.

"I am sorry Dazai san"

There was something on dazai's face. There was this same weird smile that akutagawa saw on his face in the factory that day. Akutagawa was yet to decipher this smile.

Notes

Hey guys!

English is not my first language so errors might be possible 🙃
Any suggestions for improvement will be appreciated 👍 😊

Thank you for reading!!