Days Go Bye | Rick Grimes

As A Friend.

Chapter Five

I spent the night in the house once more. Hiding away from everyone. I was asked to stay on the land to make sure Carl was okay. I took a walk around the grounds and every two seconds it was people saying hello. So walked into the wheat field, away from everyone, I saw a log and went to sit down. I froze seeing a bag, and then a lid, to something familiar. I looked around and when I saw it my stomach turned. I picked it up and looked at it, positive pregnancy test... There was one woman I know for a fact who was sexually active recently. I grabbed the lid and capped it shoving it in my pocket and walked back to camp... It wasn't my business. It could be Shanes. I saw her talking to Glenn, they looked over when I saw Rick walking up. I stopped seeing him go to her. I saw them talk before he looked my way, as they seemed to finish Beth came up and spoke to him, and then he gestured to me before walking away. She looked my way after I turned and began walking to the house. When I glanced behind me she was following after. Great. I sat on the swing chair again. Looking off, where I could see Rick. He looked a lot better out of the sheriff's uniform and looked older. I heard a clearing of throat. I looked to see Lori. I looked back toward Rick.

"I want to talk... About it all."

"Because of you, Rick knows about my little high school crush. You have made this apocalypse thing so much harder for me." I said and she stood staring at me. "If you want me to step back I will... Just know how-" I choked thinking about it. "How hard it will be for me. Carl is... Is like a nephew to me. You guys are all I got." I looked away.

"What I said was... Mean and hurtful and I... I'm so sorry... You don't need to be blood to be my sister." she whispered and I didn't look at her. "You are his Aunty. A good one at that. He wouldn't be here... Without you. Rick told me what you said to him, and how you carried Carl half of the way because Rick was slowing down... How you know his blood type... You are our family." She said and I looked at her. She was sitting next to me now...

"I know," I whispered. She smiled. "No. Lori- I know. I know." I said and she stared. "You shouldn't have left it on the field," I said and she looked as I saw Rick walking out there now- she jumped up but I grabbed her. "I have it. Lori, you need to think okay? I know Rick doesn't know. I have no intention of telling him. But you should." She sat down next to me sighing.

That night when Daryl was Shot I was the one who volunteered to help. I stitched him up as Rick and Shane spoke to him, then we had dinner and I ate silently. I ignored everything. God, I hated it here. It was so awkward and I stood. "Excuse me please," I said and walked out of the kitchen. I took that seat again and thought. God, I wanted to leave. Up and disappear. I hadn't felt this way since... High school. Since my dad died. Since mom-

"Hey." I jumped out of my skin. Rick sat beside me slowly. "Is everything okay?"

"Fine... Look you're our leader, right?" I asked and he laughed.

"I guess."

"Well. As our leader, I can... Tell you anything right?" I asked and he nodded at me.

"As my friend, you can." He grabbed my hand.

"I don't want to die," I whispered. "But I also don't... Want to be alive." I whispered and he stared at me. "Rick after everything... When my dad died... My mom dying... I knew I would never do what he did. I just..." He hugged me. I hugged back.

"You will be okay."

"There's more... I just... Can't tell you yet..." I said and he nodded slowly. "I shouldn't." I pulled him closer and he held me closer. "You should go... Before Lori... I don't want her feeling any sort of way." I muttered and he hummed kissing my head. "Thanks." I hummed and he got up leaving.