There is not enough letters in the alphabet to tell you how much I love you

Affection

It was so unexpected.

Maybe it wouldn't have been if he questioned himself sooner, but feelings were never his field of expertise.

One morning, like any others, she sat down next to him for breakfast, like she did for every meal of the day and greeted him with a simple, "Good morning Keith," accompanied by a gentle and tired smile.

He always thought it was pretty cute, but she probably wouldn't appreciate the comment. He responded kindly.

Like usual.

Nothing less. Nothing more.

So why the heck did his heart skip a beat like that? Sure, sometimes he worried his cheeks might turn red, but today, it was like a truck hit him and then reversed to be positive he was as crushed as an ant.

Since he was young, Keith always doubted that one day, he'd find his person and instantly know it. There wouldn't be fireworks all around them while the world disappeared and everything became blurred except for them. Careless whispers wouldn't start playing out of nowhere. No one would be able to see his heart beat fast, as if it was trying to pierce through the skin of his chest in a comic way, making a loud sound. His pupils wouldn't take the form of hearts as he stared lovingly at this amazing girl while hers did the same.

That was ridiculous.

She just began eating what Hunk cooked, for once choosing to participate in the conversation while he panicked inside, hoping it wasn't showing too much. That would be embarrassing and the boy wasn't sure he could play it off at the moment.

What were you supposed to do in those kinds of situations?

Act like everything was normal? It sounded nearly impossible, coming from one of the guys who fights aliens every day and had been on the verge of death more than once.

Be nicer than usual? How did he typically behave? Why couldn't he remember their past interactions without noticing how pretty she always looked? Too many questions.

Grab her hand under the table? No way, he'd freak her out. That was like the opposite of acting casually.

Ask Shiro for advice? No, he wanted to figure this out on his own.

Prepare some kind of stunning declaration of his undying love? This was way out of character for him and not the type of things she seemed to be into.

No. No. No.

None of these were good enough ideas. Despite how hard the first one appeared unimaginable to accomplish, it was the best option. For now.

Keith had no idea if he could pretend he was careless of everything while Pidge sat next to him, unaware of the chaos she caused in his brain.

Where could that kind of affection have come from?

Of course he found himself fond of their other teammates for some time now, more than he thought possible when he first met them on that fateful night. Even if he still had some trouble voicing it out.

This was probably why the blue paladin liked to call him emotionally constipated.

Actions were how he did things, how he showed he cared.

Shiro had been his favorite person since the day they met, being the first to actually pay attention to him since his dad tragically passed away.

Hunk was a nice guy to talk to, understanding that it wasn't because the red paladin stayed mostly silent that the conversation didn't interest him. He liked their discussions, so much that just listening was honestly enjoyable and didn't make him uncomfortable in any way.

Even if Lance could still be obnoxious and get on his nerves from time to time, it was bearable, more than he was willing to admit. Some of his jokes were actually a bit funny too, a secret Keith was prepared to take to the grave, not even the Galra could force this kind of information out of him.

Allura, ever since finding out he was part Galra and had a pretty bad reaction to that news, they were getting along quite well. She was kinda like a big sister, caring, but knew how to be bossy and annoy him.

And then, there was Coran who was... well, Coran. There were honestly no better words to describe him. When they were back on earth, they should try making his name an adjective, or at least a type of person that fitted his... special character.

However, his feelings toward Pidge were way out of... of what?

What should be acceptable?

His competences? Hers? Theirs?

He wasn't about to give up because of something foreign to him. If he did so, God knows that being a paladin of Voltron, who consistently had to face new kinds of dangers and environment would be impossible.

Keith had realized some time ago that she had an effect on him, but only now, as she observed him waiting for an answer, all of their eyes were on him. Someone had probably asked a question while they were all still sitting around the table for breakfast. "Sorry, can you repeat, I wasn't paying attention?"

Was her face a bit red? "I was just wondering if you were okay. You barely said anything since you sat down and were just staring." Oh, had it been that long already Keith thought, realizing all of their plates were close to being empty. Maybe they were all just very hungry and ate in five ticks?

"I'm fine, just tired." She simply nodded, avoiding looking him directly in the eyes. "Suuuure, that's why you were gazing at Pidgeon there for the entire meal, 'cause you were exhausted, noooooo other reasons at all." That's why he refused to admit Lance didn't piss him off all the time. He still knew how to pull his strings and ruin the mood.

"Lance, leave him alone." Keith didn't have to look at Shiro to know he was thinking like the Cuban, his tone of voice said it all. Not like he cared right now.

All he could ponder about was how he was going to make Katie "Pidge" Holt his. One way or another. No matter the effort it would take.

*******

1031 words

The title was supposed to be "There is not enough letters in the alphabet for me to tell you how much I live you" but Wattpad thought it was too long, but the original name is on ao3!

Hope you liked it and sorry if there's any mistakes <3

Idk when I'll update, just wrote this 'cause I messed Kidge.

Tumblr: ria-777