Playing Dangerous

XXI

Tate's POV...

I feel like I will vomit from disgust. This man... this man is bane of my existence. And now he dares and blackmails me. I sob quietly as I hold onto him, my hands gripping his jacket. I hate that I'm crying because of him, my pride is shattered.

Stupid, stupid Tate.

I can feel how he doubts to hold my freezing and shaking hands or not. But he doesn't. We ride in complete silence even when we're stopped by red light. I sob and I know he can hear it. He hears as I sniff and tension is visible on his back as muscles clench.

Finally I hand him helmet back and we stand in front of huge building with bar's name lighting in red. "Welcome to my personal hell," he says and leads me inside. Tonight's New Year's eve so every person is wearing colorful feathers and make out in every corner of the room whilst others dance. My insides hurt as these feathers remind me of strip club. "Is everything okay?"

"Yes, yes. Pour something for me." I order. We take bar seats and take shot after shot, he drinks as much as I do as if he also needs it.

We share gazes, sad gazes. In my eyes there's hatred, in his eyes... desperation and curiosity. Glimpse of his exhausted and sorrowful face makes me feel even worse. Man, I love him. I fell for him and there's no cure for me. Yes, I hate him as much as I love him. He threatens me, blackmails me but at the same time I've never felt more loved and respected by anyone than this man. Not by the way he speaks or acts, but by simply looking at me.

I feel tears gathering in my eyes so I leave for the dance floor. I'm drunk enough, so nothing matters right now, I feel numb, the whole world is spinning around me and it's the best feeling I've ever felt in my whole life. I understand why he's never actually sober, this is relaxing. Physical numbness eases mental struggles and I get to forget last few hours, all the dirty mouths that touched my skin tonight, all the pain Silas made me endure.

My body is free, it sways as it wants. After long fifteen minutes of dancing and swaying I notice Silas watching me, he's been watching the whole time.

After today's experience I feel like a whore, and I feel those self-loathing feelings easing as I perform on the dance floor bolder and bolder. I grind to guy I'm seeing for the first time, I shake my ass and I touch his every inappropriate and appropriate places. Soon I'm the center of attention and Silas is the last concern of mine, I don't care what he's doing or what he's thinking. "The man you're looking at," the male from behind says. "Is he always that... feisty? He didn't take his eyes off of you."

"Don't mind him." I don't even care what I'm doing until someone's punched in the face and I'm thrown over the strong shoulder.

Apparently everything didn't happen as quickly as I thought. He punched the guy and fight started but Silas quickly knocked him down and then threw me over his shoulder. I realize it now as I watch bloody-nosed male and bouncers in the center.

"Put me down, please!" He doesn't listen to me. "I said put me down." As he lets me down his intense and annoyed green eyes flash at me.

"That's enough fun for you today." He says sternly as I stand speechless at the sight of his raged expression.

"You do not make decisions for me." Something inside me snaps and I return the same attitude. "I will do whatever I want and you will not interfere."