The Shadows And The Blonde: A Taphie Fan-Fiction

-16-Sophie

TW: Somewhat suicidal thoughts-

Sophie felt every in the room glare daggers at herself and Tam. She reached out and grabbed Tam's hand for comfort. After moments of tension filled silence and confusion, of course Fitz was first to speak up. His voice held an obvious edge, and his teal eyes were so cold it sent shivers down Sophie's spine.

"Well, don't just stand there. Explain,"  Fitz glared expectantly. "Well-I-" Sophie stuttered, not knowing what to say or do. She felt frozen in place and time. There was nothing to say, nothing to see. Her vision blurred. Colors and shapes shifted into blobs and blotches, then the world went black.

She couldn't think, couldn't feel. All there is was gray.

Sophie had been through searing pain, torching anger, crippling depression, but nothing felt so...empty.

Fuzzy, flat gray.

Promises. Confessions.

No emotions. No thoughts. 

No anger, or pain.

No sadness, no joy.

No bitterness, no hope.

Words swam and shifted in her head, until they morphed into one word. One feeling.

Numb.

Suddenly, a blistering brightness seared across her vision. As her eyes fluttered open, she found nothing but golden circles and blobs. All in different shades, some dark, some light. Some blinding, some boring. The blobs shifted into colors, the colors sharpened into shapes. After a while, Sophie finally saw the bright canopy of her humongous bed. However, despite the vibrant colors and light, she still felt.....empty. Numb. Like she wasn't who she was. Not Sophie Elizabeth Foster, just an empty shell of who she used to be.

"Oh Sophie, you're awake!" A graceful figure with auburn colored hair and soft features loomed over her. Despite her beautiful features, the dark circles under Edaline's eyes indicates her lack of sleep.

"Yea," Sophie replied with an emotionless and dismissive tone. Almost distant. Edaline frowned. "Oh Sophie, did something happen?" Her worry laced in every word. "No, just leave," Sophie replied, her voice distant and final. She saw the hurt in her adoptive mother's eyes. Not that she cares about it anyway.

"O-ok......" With a final worried glance, Edaline hurried out of the room with steps that seemed rushed and hesitant at the same time.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'Fast forward :D'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Time was irrelevant. Everyday that passed seemed to be meaningless. Every single day, Sophie became more and more numb. Her body was on autopilot, and she grew more and more distant.  Of course her friends all seemed to notice, and a few even accused her of such behavior. But nothing mattered to Sophie anymore. Why was she even living? Why is she still alive? Every waking hour she was getting more and more tired of surviving, wondering the same questions over and over. She defeated the Neverseen. There's no more purpose or reason in Project Moonlark anymore. Everyday she would stare longingly at the sky, wondering when will she finally feel again. If elves had indefinite life spans, doesn't that make life pointless? There's no more joy, no more responsibility. If she died, would it matter? 

So there Sophie was, cold and distant to all of her friends. They eventually gave up on her, after weeks of worry and rage. Finally, peace. Sophie lay there on her bed, for who knows how long, bathing in her emptiness alone.

Suddenly her door creaked open.

A figure stood there.

Tam,