GABRIELLE
I COULDN'T sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I could feel rough hands groping my skin, sending a voltage of memories that crippled me to move. I could feel the monster's hot breath fanning over my skin. Tears started to gather at the side of my eyes as memories came crashing on me like a tidal wave of torture. I couldn't breathe, no matter how much I focused, the air seemed to leave my body.
Dots started to blanket my vision. My sobs ricochetted in the closed confines of my room. As the cold wind gusted against my skin, my body toyed with shivers crawling through my body. I did want to scream, to stop the madness, that this was just a hallucination created by my damaged brain. He was no longer here. He was gone. He was gone and I was the reason for it.
I opened my eyes, my breathing labored as I fumbled any power to rise from my bed. I craned my neck to look at the clouded window. I could also hear the pattering of raindrops on our roof as the thick sheet of rain whipped against my window. A lightning strike, showcasing a flash like a strobe, elicited a fear that crept inside of me. A frightening clap of thunder followed after, making me feel so vulnerable and alone.
Nasa kabilang kuwarto lang naman si Lola. I knew she was sleeping at this hour. As much as I'd love to scream, I couldn't. I did not want to bother her. Baka mag-alala na naman siya. Ayokong pinag-aalala si Lola ngayong matanda na ito. As much as possible, I wanted to make everything comfortable for her.
Nanginginig pa rin ang kamay ko habang nakatingin sa bintana. Ilang taon na ang nakalipas. Dapat hindi ko na 'yon inaalala. I was safe; we were safe. The monster that thrashed my life was no longer here, but he kept on bothering me, showing up in dreams like constant torture.
Binuksan ko nalang ang ilaw at naglakad patungo sa study table ko. Binuklat ko ang aking libro at nagsimulang magbasa. Kahit na sobrang sakit na ng mata ko, at gusto nang matulog, hindi pa rin papayag katawan ko.
As I was reading, my eyes darted to the clock, it was midnight, and my heartbeat skyrocketed. Today was August 20, and I could still remember what happened on that day years ago. Pinikit ko nalang ang mga mata ko para pigilan ang pag-iyak. I couldn't do it.
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WALA AKONG tulong. My eyes were droopy and exhausted from the lack of sleep. Pero kahit na gano'n ay pinilit ko pa ring tumayo at mag-ayos para pumasok. Mamayang 12 PM pa ang unang klase ko kaya may time pa akong pumunta sa mansion para asikasuhin ang ilang gawaing bahay.
I was working as a part-time maid in one of the most powerful families in Ilocos. They were the Alcaraz. The mistress of the Alcaraz household was the current Vice Governor of the province. Malapit din ito sa mga Singson kaya 'pag may okasyon ay palagi ko rin na nakikita si Zerachiel.
Pagkarating ko sa mansion ng mga Alcaraz ay agad kong nakita si Angelica Alcaraz, the Vice Governor. She was with her bodyguard. Madalan ko nalang nakikita si Anthonio Alcaraz sa labas ng kanilang masyon dahil may sakit ito. Mag-iisang taon na rin atang may sakit at kahit anong gawin ng mga doctor, hindi magawa-gawang pagalingin ang matanda.
When Angelica Alcaraz saw me, she smiled and waved. She was so kind and generous. She was always present during difficult times in the province. Kasama ng mga Singson, palagi siyang naro'n para tumulong. She was not just a show-off politician, she was genuine and perfect to serve the people. Hindi siya istrikto sa mga katulong gaya ko. Siya rin ang naghire sa akin para maging kasambahay sa kanila.
Siya rin ang nagset ng schedule ko rito sa mansion para hindi masagasaan ang pag-aaral ko. I also told her what happened to her— partially about what actually happened, and she said she would try her best to get her out of jail. Mag-iisang taon na rin 'yon, at mukhang walang progress. It was difficult to file a motion of reconsideration when the suspect didn't even want to speak the truth.