Superheroes

Stiles doesn't know what to do with himself after they remove the trigger words from Barnes. They all take a week to recover, but everyone knows it worked. Barnes makes Stiles try the trigger words multiple times just to check. He also remains himself with no nudging or slipping into the Winter Soldier.

That doesn't mean he's not still a traumatized soldier.

After the first nightmare Barnes has post trigger removal, he almost puts his metal fist through a window. Stiles raises an unimpressed eyebrow but reminds him that recovery isn't linear and they only removed the trigger words, not the trauma. When Barnes asks him why not, Stiles rolls his eyes.

"I know you don't want to hear this, but if we removed every piece of trauma you ever experienced, you wouldn't be able to remember your own name, let alone anything else." Stiles gestures to the chair in the conference room that Barnes left spinning in his rage. "When you've been fighting, mentally or physically or emotionally or whatever, you can't stop like you're flicking a switch."

Barnes settles a bit and sulks back to the chair. He stops short of crossing his arms in a pout and Stiles tries not to grin. "I meant what I told you the day we did the last removal. Turning the pain into power is hard but you've done it. I know you'll continue to do it. That struggle is a testament to your character."

Stiles goes back to his paper. He and Derek haven't mentioned how the sessions with Barnes aren't as frequent or in-depth, current session notwithstanding. They haven't talked about the contract and how Stiles doesn't think he's going to renew at the end of the month. Stiles would much rather have a contract between himself and Barnes instead of the one Fury set up. He also thinks moving to virtual or phone sessions would be fine.

While having access to Columbia's resources is amazing, Stiles misses their little rental house in Ithaca. He also misses not worrying about being monitored, although he hasn't been too concerned since that secret dropped. He misses being able to talk to his pack and family without worrying about breaking the NDAs more than they already have.

But he also wouldn't trade this experience for the world.

Their session turns to a general chat more than counseling. Barnes' demeanor has been overall lighter since the trigger words were removed. He's able to joke with Steve, accept and give physical touch, and handle social situations with large groups with ease. When he gets overwhelmed, he uses his coping skills and voices his emotions and feelings rather than bottling it in.

Stiles feels like a proud parent.

Taking advantage of the light-hearted conversation, Stiles brings up the contract timeline. "So, I want to preface this by saying you're doing amazing." Barnes pauses in his drawing, gaze slowly sliding from the paper to meet Stiles'. He doesn't look impressed. Stiles snorts. "I'm serious. I wouldn't bring this up if I didn't think you could handle it."

"Handle what?" Barnes asks with suspicion.

"Me going back to Ithaca."

He watches Barnes as he drops that little nuke into the room. The other man sits up properly and leans back in the chair. "I..." he begins after a moment, before giving up that line of questioning and going with a simple, "Why?"

"Why would I go back?" Stiles asks, making sure he has the right idea. Barnes nods. "Because I don't need to be here. I believe that we can continue over the phone, or through a video call, or even me coming to visit every other month. Hell, I can drive down on a weekend if I need to."

Barnes still looks unsure. Stiles understands the concern, since his first reaction to his life-saving therapist cutting back on his sessions due to progress was absolute rage. He ended up taking his handy-dandy baseball bat to a tree in his backyard to work through it. When he told the therapist, the fucker praised him for feeling his emotions. The pack spent the next year asking if he needed to visit "Mr. Tree" every time he was slightly annoyed.