Tiny Dancer

Survival of the Hottest Part 2

While I was all for going to the beach this weekend, even with the creatures that are the Vega sisters were coming, but my Dad reminded me that I had my cousin's Quinceanera to go to and thankfully it was being held indoors. At least my friends could enjoy the nice cool ocean, while I was stuck in a room full of snooty Cubans.

My Dad's relatives could be a bit stuck up as they are all super successful doctors, lawyers, and statesmen, and while my Dad is a successful attorney I don't appreciate dealing with their stuck-up attitude to anyone not as commercially successful as them.

"Now Mi Fauno, remember what I told you?"

My Dad and I were on our way to the birthday girl's house before going to the hotel we were staying at, when he reminded me of the ground rules about dealing with the Palmero/Lopez family.

"Stick to the Lopez family."

"If Benny offers you anything in her flask?"

"Politely decline and go to Aunt Angie."

"And if anyone talks about Castro with you?"

"Politely excuse myself and hide with George at the buffet table."

"That's my girl."

While my Dad came from a humble background fighting tooth and nail to get where he is, his dad's side of the family was very well off and didn't know my Dad existed till he was already in college. He was able to connect with his Uncle Vic and his family, hence the reason we were going to this birthday party.

Before long, we pulled up to the front of the house when my Aunt Angie came running out looking as beautiful as ever. She kissed my Dad on the cheek and quickly turned to hug the life out of me.

"Thank you so much for coming Raf and you too Blake, I know this will mean a lot to Carmen."

She continued talking to my Dad while I made my way inside to find Angie's husband George on the couch sadly sipping a beer. He looked up when I closed the door and went back to looking depressed while watching football. I slowly walked up to him.

"Okay, I know your mom hasn't met that grizzly fate you've wished for, but why do you look like someone shit in your coffee?"

He looked back up at me with the same sad big-headed face.

"Didn't you hear? There was a plane crash and my company is under investigation for it, they think our gear caused it and I'm out of work with an expensive birthday party to deal with."

"Angie made it seem like everything is okay."

"Yeah, well, what kind of father can't even give his daughter a Quinceanera? I can't even come up with a gift that isn't crap or that I need to ask Angie to pay for."

We sat there in silence for a bit when he spoke up again.

"What did your dad get you for your Quinceanera?"

"I didn't want one, but he wrote me a song and sang it to me when we had dinner with my friends."

"Your dad sang to you?"

"He was a theatre kid, I go to a performing arts school. What do you expect?"

George was quiet again and sipping his beer, he looked like he was thinking really hard which is impressive given the size of his head.

"I gotta do that... I got to write a song for Carmen and sing it to her."

I had a grossed out look on my face.

"No offense Uncle George, but Carmen has told me that when you sing angels die."

"Fine, then you'll do it Miss Hollywood. Show me what that fancy school has taught you."

I got up to walk away, there was no way in hell I was doing that.

"No thanks."

He got up to block the door I was going to go through.

"If you don't, I'm going to go down to your school. I'm going to pull up in a low-rider in my boxers and when your in front of all your classmates, I'm going to honk the horn 'dadadadada-dadadadada'! Have good day sweetie, don't get pregnant!"

I rolled my eyes at his threat.

"I'm not Carmen, that doesn't work on me."

"I'll pay you 50 bucks."

I thought hard for a moment about this pathetic conversation.

"Fine."

.....................................

Sorry, not sorry. I've been binging George Lopez and had to do it.